Over at BuzzFeed, staff writer Charistian Zamo was given a super-fab drag makeover by none other than Drag Race Allstar legend Chad Michaels. Check out the amazing transformation after the jump!
Here’s how Christian started out – scruffy and ADORABLE, omg.
But that didn’t last long. Here’s the pubescent mug that emerged after he shaved (Awwww!). “Typically,” he writes, “queens remove every SINGLE strand of body hair (some dedicated queens go as far as shaving off their eyebrows). Luckily for me, Chad only required that I shave my face and chest. BLESSED.”
Next step? “Gluing down those manbrows, literally with Elmer’s glue, is typically the first step a queen takes to start her dragtastic transformation. This gluing process helps to control the queen’s eyebrows so they can be easily covered with makeup.”
He goes on to say: “Because I have ~lusciously~ thick eyebrows, Chad had to scoop out and lather on the glue until my eyebrows were completely stuck to my face. I felt like I was the construction paper in a preschooler’s art project. Fierce brow problems, I suppose.”
Next up? The art of the BEAT. “Once those eyebrows are tamed, the next step on a queen’s journey is to ‘beat her face,’ aka cake her face with foundation. The purpose of the roughly 69 beaten layers of foundation is to cover up any scars and blemishes.”
As Chad put it, “It’s about setting up your canvas.”
Ready for some contour? “Although I DISAGREE,” he writes, “Chad compared my nose to Barbra Streisand’s, so you better believe she thinned that out real quick. Drag is all about exaggeration of female beauty, so in a matter of moments, Chad ‘wiped away’ all of the man and gave me a more feminine facial structure. Tbh, my contoured cheekbones could’ve spread butter on your toast this morning.”
Next step: the all-important eyes! “I went from Trekkie to young Liza Minnelli once Chad gave me a couple smoky eyes and upgraded my lashes.” he said. “Treat and love yourself with quality makeup and lashes, queens!” he admonished.
“Finding the right eyebrow technique for yourself is crucial. Typically, queens use pencils and creams to create their eyebrow look. Chad, however, uses wet powder.”
THEN: It’s ALL ABOUT a gorgeous lip, of course. “Chad overdrew my lips with liner, filled them in with a nude lipstick color, and then went over those puckers with a brush.”
Coming along beautifully….
Getting ready: Tights…. then another pair of tights…. then a pair of fishnets. (Full confession: “I had to slide some some hip inserts in between the first and second layer, because my hips don’t lie and they totally belong to a man.”)
“You’re completely putting yourself on the line when you’re in drag,” Chad said as she put the final touches to his wig. “They’re either going to love you or they’re going to hate you, but the most important part is having fun.”
Hmmmm… now what to name this fabulous creature?
“As Chad applied a finishing touch of lip gloss to my lips, my drag name came to me: Val Dicktorian.”
HA! LOVE IT!
“Bio: Val Dicktorian is one leggy, confident bitch. Although growing up as a bottom feeder, she graduated at the top of her class. But don’t get it twisted — just because she can read you like a textbook, Val is fluid in street smarts.”
and HEEEEEEEEERE’S VAL!
Writes Christian of the experience: “Although I’ve been out for over four years now, I’m still learning to be comfortable with my sexuality. Oddly enough, there’s just as much pressure in the gay community to act masculine as there was in my conservative religion growing up.
“For the first time in my life, wearing drag gave me the freedom to act entirely how I wanted without feeling the need to please any societal norms.”
Check out the whole story, and see more pics, at BuzzFeed.
AND DON’T FORGET (the point of all this!):
You can catch Chad Michaels and all your other favorite Drag Race queens at the first-ever RuPaul’s DragCon May 16 and 17 at the Los Angeles Convention Center.