• Ship sinks in Red Sea, 1,300 aboard.

• California city bans smoking in all outdoor locations, including streets, sidewalks.

• Nick and Jessica secretly dating.

• Die Another Day director arrested for soliciting undercover cop in Hollywood while in drag.

• 80-year-old mauled to death by black bear at petting zoo.

• JetBlue in the red.

• Heather Locklear seeks divorce from Richie Sambora.

• Devious Kama Sutra worm promises sex, destroys computer files.

• Arrgh! Howard Stern’s satellite radio show plundered by pirates.

• Christians upset (when aren’t they?) over upcoming Britney Will & Grace.

• MySpace invaders sexually assault teenage girls.

• Simon Cowell looking for magicians in Vegas (to make him disappear?)

• Irish rocker nags US to help the poor.

• Previews for Lestat, Broadway musical based on The Vampire Chronicles, postponed due to such out-of-town reviews as “didactic, disjointed, oddly miscast, confusingly designed and floundering in an almost unrelentingly saccharine score by Elton John.”