John Hill writes:

I was born and raised in San Antonio, Texas, and every year I looked forward to going to Spurs games with my dad to pretend i was interested so he wouldn’t get mad at me for being obsessed with Barbie dolls and tap shoes. So, in other words, the San Antonio Spurs mean a lot to me. However, now that Eva Longoria has graced San Antonio with frequent, racist visits to her boyfriend, Spurs player Tony Parker, I want to never set foot in the Alamodome again.

I’ve been paying attention to the racial slurs that have popped out of Eva like “girl poop”. You know, little rabbit turds. First of all, what kind of Mexican insults other Mexicans by calling them…Mexicans? Just cuz you embarrass yourself weekly on television pretending to act doesn’t mean that you can just “not be mexican” anymore. Then, you’re going to insult your boyfriend’s race? Eva was worried her grandmother wouldn’t approve of her dating a black guy. What makes her think his grandmother wouldn’t want him dating an apologetic Mexican?

The greatest moment came, for me at least, when the San Antonio Express-News asked Longoria about her favorite food in San Antonio. I was impressed when she said “taco cabana,” which is a genius answer. But then she said she especially loves their barbacoa, a Mexican delicacy that’s basically cow ass and meat ring stewed and then shoved into a tortilla with beans. Something nice, non-racist actresses would never be caught dead eating.

She’s a selective Mexican. When it gets her cast in TV shows, great; if it means she has to accept the people of San Antonio, she wants nothing to do with them, except when they cook ass in a tortilla for her.

– John Hill