Two-C*nt Post

Oprah is trying to force wedding-party guests out of their reserved rooms at the San Ysidro Ranch near her estate in Santa Barbara to make room for the celebrities attending her fundraiser for Barack Obama. “Oprah’s people have been calling the bride to either move or vacate some of the rooms to accommodate her guest list,” said a source. On the other coast, another one-namer is getting its way. Tenants in the Central Park West apartment building where Bono has a penthouse once owned by Steve Jobs have been forbidden to use their fireplaces because the U2 narcissist didn’t like their smoke. (Page / Six)