Oh no, not the pig flu, anything but the pig flu… yawn.

Remember SARS? How about Bird Flu? Swarms of Killer bees anyone?

Brace yourself for a dull week in the papers as the whole world goes batshit insane about ‘Swine Flu’.

Feel free to believe everything and spend the next few paranoid months hiding inside your house, but me personally, I’m not getting too worried about this one.

Over my lifetime, I can’t even begin to imagine how many pigs my voracious ‘double bacon and cheese sandwich’ addiction has been responsible for killing. I just figure the cute little sods are trying to get their own back.

I’m taking bets on how long it takes for a radical religious type to link it to something f*ucked up about ‘lying with swine’ in some crazy old holy book.

So to relax your stressed out head, enjoy this old, bad quality clip of Christopher Walken absolutely rockin’ the tale of the ‘Three Little Pigs‘. The man’s timing is amazing.