There’s a reason that ABC World News Tonight has been trouncing the competition lately and it’s not because Brian Williams lied about a helicopter ride. It’s because they’ve stumbled onto the perfect formula: Hot Guys + Hard News = Ratings Gold. There seems to be a never-ending parade of hot reporters, hot “experts,” and, of course, their resident anchor god, David Muir. Just check him out below. Lester Holt WISHES he could smolder with the same intensity as David.
Then there’s the jewel in their reporting crown, Gio Benitez. Just look at him (below). Those muscles! THE BEST ARMS IN JOURNALISM! When he joined World News in 2013 (from CBS WFOR-4 in South Florida), ABC News president Ben Sherwood wrote a note to his staff saying: “Versatile and hard-charging, Gio worked for years as an investigative producer before going on the air. He will be a welcome addition to the World News family.” All I got from that is that he is “versatile.” Plus, he loves his abuelita and Mickey Mouse, what more could you want in a husband?
Then there’s Matt Gutman, the Kyle Chandler look-alike with the ears I just want to grab onto while I’m riding him like a stallion. Now THAT’S a DILF.
And yummy little upstart Tom Llamas (pronounced Yah-miss) (which, when you think about it, means his parents named him Thomas Yahmiss) (I love that). He gets so excited when he’s allowed to sit in the big-boy chair and anchor the news when David is away. I just want to squeeze his little cheeks and tell him what a good job he’s doing.
And we can’t forget weather expert Rob Marciano. This preppy little slice of Wonder Bread can do whatever he wants with me. My body is ready.
The thirst is real!