NEW HOLLYWOOD SLANG

Heche-ing it out: temporary lesbianism for press. As in: “Lindsay is just Heche-ing it out with Samantha. Don’t worry, she’ll go back to Wilmer.”

Hasselbecking: ceaselessly and annoyingly arguing a point, even though you are wrong.

As in: “Stop Hasselbecking me about Lindsay’s acting ‘talent.’ She made one good film five years ago. She’s just another…”

…Hacktress: a professional celebrity who continues to float on the A-list, despite making only crap. See also: Gwyneth, Halle, Nicole, Reese, etc etc. Which reminds me of…

Gwyn and bare it: pretend to be a high-minded, serious actress, until it comes time to promote your film – at which point you happily slut out on every red carpet, wearing just a few black Band-Aids, a la Gwynyth Paltrow during her Iron Man junket. As in: “Look Lindsay, I know you don’t want to dress up and go to the Criterion release party for I Know Who Killed Me, but you just have to Gwyn and bare it again….”

– James St James