There has always been a sneaky subtext to SMALLVILLE—the whiff of a hint that Clark Kent is secretly a big nelly homo. The whole premise is OBVIOUSLY a metaphor for closeted teens (he can’t show his true self to anyone, he’s an outsider, not like the other kids, he has to hide his secret BLAH BLAH BLAH). In almost every episode of seasons 1 and 2, there was a shot of Clark, inexplicably, on all fours (or bent over a sofa, spread-eagle on the ground, etc) with Lex Luthor standing behind him (bald head looking VERY phallic). And, quite frankly, their recent fallout TOTALLY smacks of a nasty breakup, with Lex being the scorned lover. I’m just sayin’.
And then there are the LEGIONS of young boys over the past few years, that Clark befriends, and “comes out” to. IT’S ALL JUST SO GAY!. If you don’t believe me (and nobody ever does,) check out this clip from the 2004 episode “Run,” that was re-aired last night. In it, Clark hooks up (COUGH, COUGH) with the young superhero Flash. And what happens here isn’t even played as subtext. Watch it, and then YOU tell ME they aren’t going for brokeback. Even the song in the background is gay! (And people wonder why I am so obsessed with this show!)
– James St. James