Don’t listen to Al Gore and his scary film – instead turn to Halliburton. “In order to head off such catastrophic scenarios [e.g., the Gulf Stream stopping so Europe can become like Alaska], scientists agree we must reduce our carbon emissions by 70% within the next few years. Doing that would seriously undermine corporate profits, however, and so a more forward-thinking solution is needed.” Halliburton’s solution – wear a big ball!
“The SurvivaBall is designed to protect the corporate manager no matter what Mother Nature throws his or her way,” said Fred Wolf, a Halliburton representative who spoke today at the Catastrophic Loss conference held at the Ritz-Carlton hotel in Amelia Island, Florida. “This technology is the only rational response to abrupt climate change,” he said to an attentive and appreciative audience.
– Claire Otway