1. Blake Lively as a slutty pothead from Laguna Beach is easier for me to buy than Blake Lively as an Upper East Side junior socialite. Just sayin’.

2. Emile Hirsch is starting to look like a young Jack Black, poor thing.

3. Aaron Johnson needs to star in more movies, please. He’s DIVINE. I think this poster does a great disservice to the movie by featuring THAT FACE in a mask. If they had capitalized on those cheekbones they might have broken $20 million.

4. Did Taylor Kitsch just save his career? He wasn’t the best thing in the movie, but he certainly didn’t ruin it. That honor goes to John Revolta, who is virtually unwatchable with his big ham head and weird swishy behavior (was that a character choice? Or is that just who he is now?).

5. I will never look at my neighborhood lawn guys the same way again.

6. VAGUE SPOILER ALERT: I thought the fake-out at the end was a cop-out. Pick an ending and stick with it, Oliver. You’re better than that hoary old soap opera gimmick. I feel like he got notes back from the producers saying they didn’t like the bleak ending, so he said “FUCK YOU, I’M KEEPING IT” and just tacked on some more crap featuring John Travolta.

7. Loved Salma Hayek, but I think she thought she was filming a telenovela and didn’t realize it was an actual movie.