Paintballing huh?… ever wanted to take that up as a sport?
Perhaps you always wanted to be in the army but someone asked, and you told.
Well fret not, now you can fulfill all your childhood dreams of warfare by driving to a wood every weekend, hanging out with IT support guys named Glen, and occasionally draging your fat gut across a field whilst getting shot at with little balls of dye.
And with the new Planet Eclipse Argyle Ego9 paintball gun you can do it in style… this bitch is covered in 11,000 friggin crystals!
if you’re gonna act like a tool, at least do it with style. Oh, and it costs 5k.
Failing that… you could buy the Tank