Yes, that’s what the headline says…. police in Russia are looking for a gang – apparently, including a surgeon – who drugged a TV soap actor and removed his testicles. Dmitry Nikolaev, 30, had drinks with a “young blonde woman” at a bar after he finished a performance at a small Moscow theatre. She invited him to a sauna, and even though he is married, he went with her. (Boy, is he in trouble…) They made out, drank some more beer and after that the actor remembers nothing. He woke up next day at a random bus stop, with blood on his pants and in pain. He was rushed to hospital, he told there that his balls had been removed and that:

“it was done like proper surgery by someone with a medical education.”

His beer must have been spiked. They fear a gang seeking to sell human organs on the black market might be involved. Russia’s Life News carried this picture of the man in the hospital. Now you can make your jokes… I don’t know maybe, “stolen family jewels” or “it takes balls to steal a guy’s ball’s”… I’m working on a few more myself, but have at it. I feel pretty sure he can’t be more embarrassed than he already is. (via Daily Mail)