8:55 p.m.: Tim Robbins urges everyone who’s been abused to come forward. OK, Tim: I am the victim of terrible abuse. Mystic River was torture! 9:02: The Finding Nemo guy thanks “my adoring children.” He must be fun to live with. 9:22: Winner Renée Zellweger is acting all quivery and humble. Nicole forces a smile. Even Harvey doesn’t look that happy, and it’s his movie. 9:40: I just can’t stop singing “You Will Be My Ain True Love.” Kidding. If these weepy, pretentious dirges are all they can come up with, they should abolish the song category. Bring back “Shaft” and “Flashdance.” 10:40: Errol Morris makes his fabulous “rabbit hole” remark. He’ll probably be found in one next week.
Michael Musto’s “La Dolce Musto” column in the Village Voice is always a charm bracelet of culture commentary. This week, he has (we hope) the final word on the Oscar ceremony.