Kid Cudi wrote a heartbreaking message to his fans before checking himself into rehab for depression and “suicidal urges”.
“It’s been difficult for me to find the words to what I’m about to share with you because I feel ashamed,” the rapper wrote on Facebook. “Ashamed to be a leader and hero to so many while admitting I’ve been living a lie. It took me a while to get to this place of commitment, but it is something I have to do for myself, my family, my best friend/daughter and all of you, my fans.”
Cudi continued, “I am not at peace. I haven’t been since you’ve known me. If I didn’t come here, I would’ve done something to myself. I simply am a damaged human swimming in a pool of emotions everyday of my life. There’s a ragin’ violent storm inside of my heart at all times. Idk what peace feels like. Idk how to relax.
“My anxiety and depression have ruled my life for as long as I can remember and I never leave the house because of it,” Cudi continued in his letter to fans. “I can’t make new friends because of it. I don’t trust anyone because of it and I’m tired of being held back in my life. I deserve to have peace. I deserve to be happy and smiling. Why not me? I guess I give so much of myself to others I forgot that I need to show myself some love too. I think I never really knew how. I’m scared, im sad, I feel like I let a lot of people down and again, I’m sorry. It’s time I fix me. I’m nervous but ima get through this.”
He ended by saying:
Love and light to anyone who has love for me if I let anyone down. I really am sorry. I’ll be back stronger, better. Reborn. I feel like shit. I’m so ashamed. I’m sorry.
No need to ever be ashamed, and no need to be sorry.
If you’re struggling, there are many, many resources available:
The National Suicide Prevention Hotline.
Los Angeles Crisis Hotlines:
L.A. Co. Mental Health/Crisis Line……..800-854-7771
Suicide Prevention Center (24 Hours)…….213-381-5111
Suicide Prevention Crisis Center…….310-391-1253 (24 Hours)
Assaults Against Women Hotline………310-392-8381 (24 Hours — L.A. County)
Women and Children Crisis Shelter………..562-945-3939 (24 Hours)
Child Abuse Hotline…………800-540-4000 (LA. County Dept of Childrens Services
Rape Treatment Center (24 Hours)……….310-319-4000
Alcoholics Anonymous (24 Hours)……….213-936-4343
Cocaine Anonymous (24 Hours)…………310-216-4444
Narcotics Anonymous (24 Hours)……….909-622-4274
California Youth Crisis Line……….800-843-5200
National Crisis Hotlines:
Alcohol and Drug Helpline – Provides referrals to local facilities where adolescents and adults can seek help. Brief intervention. 1-800-821-4357
Child Abuse National Hotline, call 1-800-252-2873, 1-800-25ABUSE
Child Abuse: To report call 1-800-4-A-CHILD
Cocaine National Hotline 1-800-COCAINE
Children in immediate risk or danger 1-800-THE-LOST
Covenant House Nineline – Crisis line for youth, teens, and families. Locally based referrals throughout the United States. Help for youth and parents regarding drugs, abuse, homelessness, runaway children, and message relays. 1-800-999-9999
CyberTipline for reporting the exploitation of children. 1-800-843-5678
Domestic Violence Resource Hotline – referrals for shelters and
counseling in your area. 1-800-799-7233 1-800-787-3224 (TDD)
Elder Abuse Hotline 1-800-252-8966
Friends of Battered Women and Their Children, 1-800-603-HELP
Kid Help – Children and adolescents in crisis will receive immediate help. Referrals to shelters, mental health services, sexual abuse treatment, substance abuse, family counseling, residential care, adoption/foster care, etc. 1-800-543-7283
NAMI Helpline National Alliance for the Mentally Ill 1-800-950-NAMI
National Youth Crisis Hotline 1-800-448-4663
National Child Abuse Hotline 1-800-25-ABUSE
National Mental Health Assn. Provides free information on specific disorders, referral directory to mental health providers, national directory of local mental health associations 1-800-969-6642 (M-F, 9-5 EST)
National Institute of Mental Health Information Line: Provides information and literature on mental illness by disorder-for
professionals and general public. 1-800-647-2642
Runaway Switchboard – National – Provides crisis intervention and travel assistance to runaways. Gives referrals to shelters nationwide. Also relays messages to, or sets up conference calls with, parents at the request of the child. Has access to AT&T-Language Line. hours. 1-800-621-4000
SAFE (Self-Abuse Finally Ends) 1-800-DONT-CUT, 1-800-366-8288
Youth Crisis Hotline: Crisis hotline and information & referral for runaways or youth in crisis 1-800-HIT-HOME, 1-800-448-4663
