On This Day in History
1896 – Whitcomb Judson of Chicago patents a hookless fastener, the first draft of the zipper. Rev Aloysious Haberhorn (my god, these names!) describes it as “nothing more than a sure gateway to the fires of hell!”
1900 – In France, the National Assembly passes a law reducing the workday for women and children to 11 hours. Weaklings! On the same day 23 years later, Alma Cummings sets record of 27 hours at the first dance marathon in NYC. She then collapsed from exhaustion, but still – USA! USA! USA!
1959 – The Dalai Lama flees China and is granted political asylum in India. He goes on to become a symbol of world peace and besties with Sharon Stone.
1967 – Jimi Hendrix burns his guitar for the first time.
1981 – At the 1st Golden Raspberry Awards, Can’t Stop the Music “wins” worst picture, defeating Cruising, Friday the 13th, something called The Nude Bomb, Raise The Titanic! (omg I want to see that) and the timeless Xanadu.
1985 – Hulk Hogan and Mr T win Wrestlemania I.
1988 – Pulitzer prize awarded to Toni Morrison for Beloved. Oprah and Gayle achieve simultaneous orgasm.
1991 – Danny Bonaduce attacks a transvestite prostitute in Phoenix, Arizona.
1999 – Fabio hit in the face by a bird while riding a Busch Gardens roller coaster.