• Another reason evangelicals might want to rethink their passion: Rocky of Ages. Sylvester Stallone says his character, Rocky Balboa, was based on Jesus Christ. “It’s like he was being chosen,” he says. “If you look to God, you can overcome your past.” Um, what? (Source)
• Actor and senior citizen Michael Douglas had himself hoisted 25 feet into the air on a cherry picker to perform the traditional “roof wetting” ceremony at a new art museum in Bermuda, where he and his trophy wife own a house. When he momentarily lost his footing, we can only guess that there was some non-traditional wetting. (Source)
• It sounds like Sean Connery isn’t sorry he turned down the $434 million (that’s right, $434 million) to play Gandalf in the Lord of the Rings movies. “I read the book, I read the script, I saw the movie,” he says, “and I still don’t understand it.” It seems clear to us: $434 million. You think Jessica Simpson understood The Dukes of Hazzard? (Source)
• Funny, we just assumed… Modified food starch, coconut and soybean oils, corn syrup, food coloring, and 2% avocado does not qualify as guacamole, maintains a Los Angeles woman who is suing Kraft Foods for misleading consumers with its so-called Dips Guacamole. “We think customers understand that it isn’t made from avocado,” a Kraft Foods’ exec said. (Source)
• Oy! Apparently, the public scolding of anti-semite Mel Gibson is over. Disney is upping the release of his Apocalypto from 2,000 screens to 2,500; the film’s on the Golden Globes shortlist for a foreign-language trophy; and Gibson will appear on the next cover of Entertainment Weekly. (Source)
• NBC is thinking of airing its Friday night rehearsal sessions of Saturday Night Live on the Internet. You know, with pratfalls and the cast breaking themselves up and forgeting their marks and saying “fuck.” Sounds funnier than the show; perhaps they should air the rehearsals on TV and save the show for YouTube. We prefer dry runs to dry heaves. (Source)
