It’s that time of year WOWers…
…where we DISCOVER our love for second servings, double dipping, and elastic sweatpants.
And no one did this annual feast of fun tradition
quite better than Monica Geller and the gang.
So sit around the table as we feast our fun on which
FRIENDS character are you on Thanksgiving?!
Do you absolutely dread small talk with your extended relatives?
Are you the single cousin who get’s coaxed into “squeezing in” at the kid’s table because there’s no more room at the big kid’s table now that you’re brother got a girlfriend?
THAN YOU’RE CHANDLER!
You’re the pessimistic, half-cranberry-sauce-half-empty, kind-of-turkey lurky and there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re just the realist of your Brady brunch.
But under all those Depeche Mode blazers,
there’s someone who’s hard-shell exterior is actually a big softie on the interior.
Do you instagram your food, yet you’re not really there for the green bean casserole?
Do you make your living room an opportunity to work the catwalk?
THAN YOU’RE PHOEBE!
You put the quirk and quirky and the gravy in your own turkey. There’s always that one relative who wears layers of varying textures from the Goodwill, discusses their community theater, and gloats about their gluten-free, plant-based diet and that might as well be YOU.
Did I mention you have the BEST outfits too?
Do you find yourself pouring an extra egg nog (or three) around this time of year?
Will you not stop talking about your ex to any relative that will listen?
THAN YOU’RE ROSS!
Good thing Adele’s new album dropped because you’re the one in your friend group who probably should check if their HMO covers therapy sessions because you definitely exercise your feelings on a day-to-day-basis. Empathy is the new apathy so I see nothing wrong with wearing your heart strings on your flannel sleeves. Putting your puppy in your love is a full-time job, just remember, when your teeth start looking purple in the family photo, you might want to consider laying off the sauce for the rest of the night.
Do you offer to help make the mashed potatoes and all your aunts side-eye each other to the Gods until you finally get the picture and beeline to the olive platter grandma put out and eat your ego? Are you the type that’s already waiting in the parking lot two hours before Black Friday starts?
THAN YOU’RE RACHEL!
Effort is your middle name and it speaks volumes to your loved ones around you. Even offering to help out, pitch a fork, carve a bird, the tomato in the tamale, it can really make or break a finger in the kitchen (literally). Plus, you know you’ve made it when you can go to the salon and ask for your name: “The Rachel.”
When you hear that “dinner’s ready,” you morph into this:
You might be a nice sibling (with an impeccable turtleneck collection), but you’re not there to make friends when the turkey comes out of the oven. To paraphrase spiritual leader Nicki Minaj, “You can tell you aren’t missing no meals,” because you can kill a tofurky loaf all on your own before half the family gets through the buffet line. Mangia, mangia, mangia!
Do you want help putting the pies in the oven, but secretly want and know that you’ll do a better job than your cousin Barry ever could, so you’ll just re-do it after he offers and performs said task horribly? Does your competitive nature bring out your true Fall colors when playing ANY family-friendly board games or sports-related activities?
THAN YOU’RE MONICA!
Lastly, and most certainly not least (my personal favorite): Monica. You’re the glue that keeps all the popsicle sticks together in your friend circle. Without you, weekly Sunday brunch wouldn’t happen. Without you, themed-birthday parties or netflix-viewing nights wouldn’t exist. Without you, there would be no Thanksgiving feast, frankly so your friends should like, be super thankful for you this year. It’s a big responsibility but you enjoy doing it.
Hug your friends, your fams, and yourself a little tighter this year.