Attention New Yorkers! Just now, on the corner of Seventh and 23rd, I watched Nicole Kidman spend about 15 minutes climbing out of an SUV and chatting with her manservant/umbrella holder, and not one other person seemed to notice and/or care. Seriously. Not the hot dog guy, not the guy selling bootleg iPod accessories, not even the horde of Japanese tourists on their way to check out the Chelsea Hotel. Every single one of you just went on doing your thing like it was no big deal, just another day when the highest paid actress in the world – and mother of two of Tom Cruise’s children! — stands around gabbing in the middle of a major intersection at the beginning of rush hour.
This kind of too-cool-for-school attitude towards celebrities has to stop, pronto. Why? Because there’s a writers strike on, and that means a lot of celebrities are sitting at home with nothing to do, and no TV shows or movie shoots to go to where they can get the fawning, adoring attention they so desperately need (and deserve). And a lot of them are going to fly out to New York thinking that maybe out here they can get somebody to notice them (because really, what celebs are there in New York? Joan Rivers? She’s not even on TV anymore!). And when nobody notices them, these celebrities are going to go stand in a busy intersection, where they’ll get hit by a car, and then somebody will look up and go oh wow, but by that point it’s too late. That’s obviously what was going through Nicole Kidman’s mind, and look how that turned out: she had to stand there getting rained on, and the only person who even cared was me. So. Start paying attention to celebrities, New Yorkers, before this writers strike ends up killing someone.
– Chris May