Last week, WOW London wrote an entry in this fine blog, describing the emergence of asexuality as a bona fide new fad. Sorry “sexuality.” People it was just a cut-and-paste job from newswires around the world! So imagine WOW Londons surprise when every Gay Website in Cyberspace picked up on it and identified, nay, OUTED WOW London as an authority on such issues!
Still, we at WOW London are not the types to shirk our responsibilities, and have taken it upon ourselves to read up a little on the subject. One site in particular caught our attention WOW London never realised there was so much to the Fag Hag / Fruit Fly thing. Quite, quite shocking.
Adrian Mutu – He Scores!
Dear American friends, you are, Im sure, aware of the National Sport here in Britain we call it Football. Thats not to be confused with your Football. You would call our Football soccer. One of the biggest teams here is called Chelsea, and one of Chelseas star players, a Romanian international is called Adrian Mutu. And young Adrian is all over the news right now.
Why? Because hes been a very, very naughty boy. Did he rob, steal or kill? No. Far, far worse. He took drugs, and had sex with porn stars. These are hangable offences in the UK, where moral values are taken very seriously indeed, especially among our sporting heroes and other celebrities.
“A STUNNING [note the block capitals] porn star told yesterday of her FOUR [and the bold type]-in-a-bed sex with drugs scandal football star Adrian Mutu. And she revealed she had known he had a cocaine habit for nearly a YEAR [easy with the boldface]. Transylvanian temptress Laura Andresan, 23, writhed naked on a kitchen table with the Chelsea ace after he began a sex romp by sucking her BLOOD. Ex-Penthouse model Laura said: ‘I was very surprised even though Im from Transylvania!'”
WOW London trusts that the Transylvania reference wasnt lost on the majority of Sun readers, because it really is quite a funny gag.
And WOW London assures you all that, if we were a good-looking, 25-year-old guy earning $100,000 a WEEK and jetting all over Europe, taking cocaine and having four-in-a-bed sex with porn stars would be the last thing on our mind. Honest.