News from Britain comes that Orlando Bloom apologized to a scooter rider he almost killed in a road accident – by writing him an autograph. Bloom pulled out in front of motorcyclist Slawomir Szydlowski and sent him flying, leaving him with deep cuts and internal bleeding. But all was rectified when Bloom jumped in the back of the ambulance to scribble a note saying ‘Sorry mate!’ and signed it. The motorcyclist has no plans to sue. Makes you wonder how many other celebrity court cases might have been so easily avoided with a simple scribbled note: perhaps “Sorry about that dented hood and fucked up spine, much love, Halle Berry” tucked under a windshield wiper, or “Apologies for the emotional distress and bleeding anus, yours forever, Michael Jackson” wrapped around a Neverland souvenir twisted animal balloon.
– Steven Corfe