No one who goes to Baywatch this weekend is expecting high art, the TV show it’s based on certainly wasn’t. But why is it THIS bad. Full disclosure, I have NOT seen it, but if you pay any attention to Rotten Tomatoes, it’s stinks like a corpse on the beach. It’s rates a dismal 19% (although audiences rated it 72%.) The critics however, like the ones below, are telling you to save your money.
“Lower what little expectation you have going in and you’ll still be disappointed.” – Scott Marks, San Diego Reader
“The Rock is fun to watch, for a while at least. The rest is one big fat wallow in instant stupid.” –Peter Travers, Rolling Stone
“Not even Zac Efron’s abs can distract us from the fact that we are treading in shallow, shallow waters.” –Tufayel Ahmed, Newsweek
“An example of lazy writing and direction with the vague hope that perhaps the involvement of Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson will attract viewers.” –James Berardinelli, ReelViews
“Not even Dwayne Johnson’s buoyant charm nor Zac Efron’s self-mocking cool can prevent this wantonly crude Baywatch reboot from sinking like a stone.” –Jason Best, Movie Talk
“More surreal stuff like [the opening], and you might have had something original. Instead, it’s just dead in the water.” –Rain Jokinen, SFist
“This misguided comedy has zero perspective on the low-grade titillation that made the series weirdly popular.” –Mike McGranaghan, Aisle Seat
“Dragged down by the weight of its many conflicting ideas, ‘Baywatch’ flails about like a drowning victim that’s incapable of rescue, ultimately leaving a bloated corpse of a movie washed ashore at the multiplex.” –Christopher Lawrence, Las Vegas Review-Journal
“DOA before the first jiggly body ever hits the beach.” – Frank Wilkins, Reel Reviews
“When the credits finally roll, they include outtakes in which the actors flub lines, and, tellingly, even those aren’t particularly funny.” –Brian Lowry, CNN