The next time someone tells you you’re a big baby or showing infantile behavior, point out the ignorance of their ways by showing them this picture. Now that’s a big baby. It’s a thing, this sex fetish for adult men to wear diapers and bonnets and suck on a pacifier while “nannies” change and powder them and wipe puréed carrots off their chins. Not our thing, mind you. Oh no. But we are amused by this Birdparty site that has compiled a best-of collection of email correspondence between a nanny or wet nurse or what-have-you named Birdparty and her babies. Via the charming newsletter b3ta.com. Always be wary of strangers who say, “Let’s go back to my crib.”

Hi coolnfunguy. What’s your real name? Mine is Mommy. Of course I will need to bathe you and breastfeed you. And when you make a doody or go pee pee in your diapers, I will have to clean that too. If you have diaper rash, I will take care of it with my paprika and hot sauce mix.

Love,

Mommy