She’ll Hook You Up

Dear Black Girl,

I’m wondering if you know why gay men seem to all have a black girlfriend to hang out in their group? Am I trippin’ or is this a fact? Is it just that they need a sassy friend to talk shit with or is there more that I just don’t understand. Please explain.

– White-Straight-and in Love with Black Women

dear w-s-ailwbw,

let me break it down for you so it will for ever and consistently be broke. it is true that gay men, especially white men, love to hang out with black women. why you ask? cause they wanna be us. they try to be like sistas so bad. the eye rolling. finger snapping. ghetto girl slang. ass poppin. it’s all good. who can blame them. we da business!

Dear Black Girl,

How come all of Chris Rock’s movies are so bad? Even Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor managed to make a few good ones. Will the same thing now happen to Dave Chappelle?

– Half Baked fan

dear half baked,

hell naw dave chappelle ain’t gon’ fall off. he keeps it real. BIG shout out to dave. i don’t like people playin on my phone either. he has crossed over and is doing big things. big up! eddie and richard are classic. untouchable. why you gotta be dissin pookie? i like chris rock’s movies. especially pootie tang. SIKE! they spinnin. they spinnin.