I was just reading an entry from July 6, 2004, about the British guy who was averse to being served faggots by his wife. You guys sort of glossed over the derivation of the word “faggot.” As a fellow homosexual, I think it’s important for you to be fully informed.

You did cursorily mention that a faggot refers to a bundle of sticks. But you left out the really good part. In the 12th or 13th century (in Britain, so it all comes together in this wonderfully synchronistic way, no?), homosexuals were burned at the stake. The bundles of sticks that they used to fry our ancient bretheren were called faggots, and that, my friends, is how we came to be called faggots by all those mean boys in junior high.

In fact, I am currently pitching a screenplay idea called “Faggots,” in which two 12th-century guys find that they are indeed sexually attracted to each other, and thus in mortal danger of being burnt to a crisp. I’ve almost got Seth Green and Ashton Kutcher signed on.

Historically yours,

Harry Redlich

Ed. replies: Two things. Why were you visiting July 6, 2004? And can we be in your movie?