Mad at your ex? Want to get back at a frenemy? Now at CrabRevenge.com you can! “Make that bitch itch,” is their motto. “Yes we sell pubic lice and yes we are proud of it!” You can purchase three different genital crab packages. The GREEN PACKAGE includes one colony of crabs, containing as many as 30
eggs. According to the website, it’s “great for one person.” It sells for $21. The BLUE PACKAGE comes with three vials of about 30 eggs apiece. According
to the website: “Use the first one straight away and you can freeze the other
two batches for over 160 days.” It sells for $37. Now the RED PACKAGE includes a vial of shampoo-resistant F-strain crabs,
which can, quote, “take up to two weeks to get rid of, and apparently bite so much
they cause the victim to scratch themselves raw.” It sells for $52. And while I certainly don’t condone sprinkling pubic lice on your enemies, I would certainly be interested in hearing the stories of someone who did. (via Esther Goldberg’s Showbiz Shmooze, t/y Brett)
