The Six-Million-Dollar Kournikova Question:

What Makes People Famous?

I just got a new job as an associate editor at Gaysports.com. If you all are interested in sports you should check it out. I love sports. No, I FUCKING LOVE SPORTS. Competition is the most invigorating thing that a person can imagine. I don’t drink ’cause alcohol tastes like camel piss. No, really, it doesn’t taste good. I know everyone thinks it does or says, “Oh, you just haven’t had the right drink.” Well, I don’t want the right drink. I like competition – it’s a much more powerful aphrodisiac, and you don’t feel like crap the next day.

I have been a sportaholic for a long time. I was the youngest person to win high point for horseback riding when I was 12. I was all-state football, tennis, soccer, and track in school. I trained as an ice dancer (shut up) and was on the national team. And now I want to compete with the 72 zillion other people who want to make the mark of fame in Hollywood. We all want it, at least a little. Even your mother wants to be recognized and remembered when she dies, that’s why we have kids. It’s something selfish to keep us famous. (LOL, I’m not really that deep, I just wanted to throw some thoughtful insight into this piece.)

I was at home sick today after a photo shoot, and since I had TiVoed the US Open from last month, I thought I’d catch up, but I found that I was thinking more than I was actually watching. I was thinking about Anna Kournikova. (I know, she wasn’t there.) When I say her name everyone knows it. She is cute, she was a pretty good tennis player, and she wasn’t absolutely retarded, but what makes her so special that people know her name? If I talked about Martina Hinges or Lindsay Davenport in the company of people who didn’t know tennis, it would be as if I was discussing the contents of Julia Roberts’ purse…useless. But if I say Anna Kournikova people know her. OK, Lindsay does look like a she had a full-on collision with a Winnebago, but she is the number-one player and Martina ruled the game. Anna at best was in the top 10, but she’s the one with the endorsements, she’s the one in music videos, I mean she ain’t THAT pretty.

So what is it about people that makes you want to know who they are? Hollywood is full of wannabes and almost-famouses, so what is so special about me? Maybe it’s the fact that I’m willing to compete even if I’m gonna lose. I say what I feel, I take my clothes off, I shock people, but none of it is to make people like me. It’s the exact opposite. It’s because I don’t give a shit. I’ll do whatever it takes to compete. And, like Anna, maybe being the best is not the important part, maybe it’s willing to try everything without fear. Now, tell me what you think makes famous people famous, I really want to know! Oh, and I threw in the pic of Andy Roddick just to make sure the guys who like guys had someone to look at as well.

OK, I took a lot of Nyquil so if you think this sounds like drug-induced crap, you’d be right. BLOG HARD!

It’s always a business doing pleasure with you!

– Dylan Vox