Literally EVERYBODY in Hollywood turned out to last night’s Divergent premiere to see if it was a bomb. I’ve got the good, the bad, and the ugly right here.
A divergent group of celebrities (HO, HO! See what I did?) walked the red carpet at the Regency Bruin Theatre in Los Angeles last night. It was an odd mix, to be sure, consisting of a smattering of A-listers and up-and-comers, but mostly just a lot of CW stars who were bussed in, I suspect, to drum up some publicity for Star Crossed. Let’s take a look at who sizzled and who fizzled.
Shailene Woodly wore a brilliant, bronze, one-shouldered Elie Saab gown:
Is Theo James finally a star after the Golden Boy debacle of 2013? The reviews aren’t in yet, but DAYUM, he looks good.
Kate Winslet brought GRAVITAS to the red carpet in a ravishing in a red dress by SAFiYAA, which featured gazaar inserts and cap sleeves, but her face looked a bit… different? Frozen? Please Kate, we love you the way you are. Don’t go down that route!
Ansel Elgort, who is made of ACTUAL snips and snails and puppydog tails, wore a too-shiny suit that I suspect he got at the Camerillo outlet mall. I know because I bought one at the DKNY store there in 1997, and this looks suspiciously similar.
Miles Teller. This boy is a player. Watch out. No good is gonna come from this one. MARK MY WORDS. He is a serial douchbag in the making. I mean. Just look at that face.
Suddenly interesting Star Crossed cutie Matt Lanter. Really, check out the show. He’s ADOOOORABLE.
The intriguingly named Grey Damon aka this generation’s William Zebka
Someone named Pia Maria Perez, who falls somewhere on the sartorial spectrum between Iggy Azalea and Brooke Hogan and I just can’t.
A$AP Rocky, the yummiest rapper EVER, omg, I could just gobble him up!
Jason Mamoa towers over his real-life sun and stars, Lisa Bonet.
Aramis Knight, who is NOT a cheap cologne, but an actor who was in Ender’s Game (BOOOOOOOO!) and more importantly, once played the young Sonny Corinthos on General Hospital, wears THAT JACKET from Zara that everyone wore to every New Year’s Eve party this past year.
Jayden Smith arrives in a skirt and tie-dyed bucket hat, busts out a few karate moves on the red carpet to remind everybody that he was once the Karate Kid…
… then mugs awkwardly for the cameras. Yeeeesh. Get off the carpet, kid, you’re making everyone uncomfortable.
DJ Zedd. At least, I THINK he’s a DJ. Maybe he’s a magician. I can’t be bothered to Wiki him. But he’s cute. And those sad little animé eyes just KILL ME.
Garret Clayton, dude, you NEVER should have shaved your head. You look like a pinhead. At least laser that hairline!
And finally, the Daphne Guiness of the 2030s, Kiernan Shipka.
(Photos: Pacific Coast News)