All of Miami is buzzing about Colin Farrell hooking up with the illustrious drag sensation Elaine Lancaster during a recent party at the Versace mansion. It seems at some point during the party, Colin retired to one of the bedrooms and was seen rolling around by himself, moaning and whatnot (as you do at parties like that). Then the lovely and irrepressable Miss Lancaster was seen going into the room and shutting the door behind her. Two hours later, Colin emerged badly disheveled, unbuttoned, unzipped, and with her shocking-pink lipstick all over his face. South Beachers were shocked, yes SHOCKED! at the lusty leprechaun’s latest shenanigans.

But I can’t imagine anybody in Los Angeles even raising an eyebrow. After all, WE remember all too well when he was living at the Chateau Marmont and was the constant companion of ANOTHER drag sensation, CONSTANCE (pictured at right). Constance has always remained coy about the true nature of their relationship, insisting they’re “just friends,” but the National Enquirer once made a point of commenting that she was seen coming out of his room in the early hours of the morning.

My take? I’ve seen straight guys writhing on beds alone at parties, and it usually means: “I’m rolling on some wicked E, babe. Come join me, and we’ll negotiate what’s in the panties later.” I know Elaine, and I know Constance, and I’ve known my share of omnisexual Irishmen. This story seems all too plausible to me.