Like most people I know, I LOVE a good wedding. Especially when it’s between a UK tabloid honey and a lesbian Calvin Klein model. And overseen by High Priestess James St. James! Allow me to explain.
You will recall the blushing bride, Rebecca Loos, best known in the UK for her saucy fling with England football hunk David Beckham. And of course you remember the dashing groom, Jenny Shimizu, as the androgynous Asian from the Calvin Klein CK One commercials – not to mention her couplings with Madonna and Betty-both-ways Angelina Jolie. Rebecca and Jenny met in Hollywood not long ago while filming an interview for Power Lesbians, World of Wonder’s anthropological exploration into the local girl scene for Sky TV in the UK, and fell head-over-heels in licky lesbian love. And St. James? He LEAPT at the chance to oversee their union. Providing he could wear a mid-calf-length clerical frock.
The bride, Loos, wore an ivory silk gown and carried a posie of delicate cream roses. Shimizu, the groom, teamed a slimline black suit with (somewhat dykey) Converse sneakers. She was accompanied by her best “man” Boo, a hard-as-nails biker-punk lesbian. The two were married by St. James, sporting his self-proclaimed “glam-drag-goth-fem-rock-sex-monk” look. It was, as the rags would have it, the Wedding of the Week.
James and I skipped the post-nuptials reception to head down to The Spotlight, where James got all the sinners’ attention in his priestly cassock. I was left at the bar reading quotes from the bible he stole from the church: “A woman is not to wear male clothing,” Deuteronomy 22:5 dictates, “and a man is not to put on a woman’s garment, for everyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord your God.” “I’m DETESTABLE!” shrieked James, as we toasted the detestable but happy couple.
– Steven Corfe
(Power Lesbians airs Sunday, May 29, at 10PM on Sky One UK)