(10:45, a bleary-eyed Blake Jacobs finally gets to work)
JSJ: You’re late.
Blake: Guuuurl, there was dead body on my street. I couldn’t leave the house.
Well, that’s original at least. What happened?
I woke up this morning to police cars and fire trucks and multiple ambuli in front of my house.
Fabulous. Were you scared? Was your first thought: OMG, it’s Chris Dorner and he’s here to get me!
He’s dead. Watch the news. All I know is they found a body in a dumpster. I’m thinking it was a homeless person.
Because of all the hobo killers in your part of town?
No, because everyone was gathered around a dumpster.
So… that still doesn’t answer why you couldn’t get to work.
There was a police tape blocking off the entire street!
And you didn’t think to, oh I don’t know, LIFT IT?
Well, I didn’t know what to do. After an hour or so, though, I finally saw a cop lift the tape up for our neighbor, so I knew I could leave.
So that’s your story?
My exclusive “Breaking News Bulletin” is that… there were police outside your house but you don’t know why?
Sort of a non-story.
You asked ME, gurl.
UPDATE: It WAS a dead body. According to the news: “A body was found in a trash container outside an apartment building in the East Hollywood area, and a suspect was being questioned. Coroner’s Assistant Chief Ed Winter said the building manager found the body of a male, whose age was not immediately known. A person was stopped nearby and was being questioned in connection with the death.