Knife Writer

If you thought that my occasional cameos in the show (I'm the one with the glasses and the beard) were pretty awful acting-wise, then you ain't seen nuthin'.

This is an Anna Nicole Smith blooper reel for her film Skyscraper, although the phrase 'blooper reel' doesn't really do it justice.

Maybe 'big sloppy mess' would be more appropriate.

You can’t tell Kanye West nothin', that's for sure. But he still thought there a reason to make a song and dance about that fact, by, well, making a song and dance about that fact. The video for "Can’t Tell Me Nothin" stars Zach Galifianakis, an American comedian, and I think it is one of the most absurd, but funny things I have seen for a while (second only to the whole 'Trapped in the Closet' affair). What makes this video even better to watch is the fact that it was filmed on Zach's North Carolina farm.

- Donal

"Chocolate Rain" phenomenon Tay "Some Stay Dry While Others Feel The Pain" Zonday has just posted his eagerly anticipated follow-up track to his YouTube channel.

The fact that he's called it "Do The Can't Dance" begs the obvious jokes, but it's actually everything you would expect from our Tay - repetitive, relentless and ridiculous. And, of course, deeply inexplicable.

Take a look:

As awkward TV juxtapositions go, it doesn't get much better than comfortable 50s family viewing disrupted by a major Surrealist.

For this is what we have for you in this clip - Salvador Dali on What's My Line?. The gist is that a panel has to guess the profession of a particular person by asking them only yes-or-no questions.

Dali seems to want to answer yes to every question put to him, but whether this is some sort of subversionary Surrealist wheeze, or whether he just has an extremely high regard for himself, his presence is an refreshing intrusion into what would otherwise have probably been 10 minutes of cloying gentility. Enjoy:

Another post from Donal, who says:

"Thought you might like these fellows, a band from Norway comprising three gentlemen in wheelchairs. After the initial 40 seconds or so (where it's funny just because they're singing in Norwegian), the lyrics actually become a witty and poignant comment on their condition. In a way.

"

Time to revisit our friends at Improv Everywhere today, folks. The latest stunt of theirs that caught my eye is called 'Suicide Jumper' and is (almost) exactly what its title would suggest. Silly but satisfying.

This is one thing I wasn't expecting this morning - to be enthralled, nay charmed, by some ultra-basic German Electro. But Alexander Marcus coloured me wrong with his catch new tune 'Papaya'. And that was before I saw the video.

The first half is loaded with potent symbolism - "Papaya, Papaya, Coconut, Banana" Alexander sings, a lobster strapped to his neck whilst he swims in what appears to be a duck-pond.

The second half has Alexander re-awakening from his fruit/crustacean-based fantasy world and celebrating his freedom by dancing enthusiastically in his bedsit.

All very odd, but all strangely worthwhile:

The last thisisaknife for a while is released today... and though I say so myself I think it's probably our BEST EVER.

But here's what Donal has to say:

"I was incredibly nervous about jumping off a pier in Bognor Regis, but Tim forced me to practice up a side street, so I did. I kept on telling myself that when it came to the actual event, I'd just have to walk off the edge without looking down at the sea. I hope you'll see in this episode that I pretty much achieved that. It hurt my feet when I hit the water. In other news this week, I managed to convince a red headed German artist woman to come to my house in Kentish Town and dance for me. But then she did something with an item from my fridge. But there's no point crying about that.

It feels quite weird though - because this episode IS THE LAST KNIFE..for maybe quite a while. It's sad. But thank God we don't have to stay up till 5 in the morning on a Wednesday editing (or, watching Tim edit). We might have a wrap party quite soon. Maybe we can invite you all - as long as you're old enough to drink Buck's Fizz.

Right. We're off to eat a self-congratulatory meal at Cafe Euro Med. I hope you enjoy the episode. Will thinks it's the first one we've made that both vaguely makes sense, and is also funny. Maybe you'll agree..."

Sometimes I wish I could push a few buttons and make a little bit of music with no fuss. Not like an iPod. That's too easy. But some sort of middle-ground. The Tenori-on is it, and it reminds me not a small amount of the Reactable:

...which everyone went mad for earlier this year, and is now used by Bjork:

Dutch electro accompanied by religious visuals, you say? Brilliant:

Kinda reminded me of Jacques Peretti's seminal archive footage/dance music mash-up show 'The Trip' which used to be on Channel 4 in the late 90s. Somehow it's not quite the same watching it in on YouTube in the clear light of day, but here's a sample for ya:

It's the question we're all asking today!

The editor of Blue Peter was suspended today when it turned out that the name given to the show's new cat, Socks, wasn't chosen by an online poll like they said it was at all.

In fact, the name picked by the public was something 'inappropriate.'

So what was this pussy name plumped for by so many?

Answers on a postcard. Please enclose an SAE.

--- UPDATE: a BBC press release reveals it was 'Cookie.' What in God's name is inappropriate about that?

Admittedly, the theremin isn't the most energetic of instruments to play, but you've at least got to put a bit of work in. Not so for Ranjit Bhatnagar of moonmilk.com, who has eliminated all physical effort by getting his robots to not only play Gnarls Barkley's Crazy on the theremin, but also to provide a drum-based accompaniment.

All these days and months and seasons spent on the internet can make the switch back into real life pretty difficult.

Apparently, yelling "-1 Old!" at someone if their topic of conversation is already known to you is pretty bad manners, but I've never been quite as bad as this:

One of those videos where, no matter what your expectations, they are confounded - simply but entertainingly.

I'm sure you remember that last month we began seeding our intriguing multi-author masterpiece, begun by none other than Luke Rhinehart.

Well, we've left it to simmer, and here's my favourite result so far. Watch them in order...

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