I’m Conflicted About My Future Husband Derrik Sweeney

Sweeney, of course, is one of the three American students who were detained in Cairo last week  for allegedly throwing Molotov cocktails at Egyptian security officials during anti-government protests in Tahrir Square, and I must say, I’m slightly conflicted about my love for him. On the one hand: He’s adorable. Just look at him. On the other hand: Going to other countries and participating in their revolutions on your Thanksgiving vacation is slightly, oh, I don’t know, dilettantish? Talk about #whitepeopleproblems. I hope he gets an “A” on his Poli Sci final. Then there’s this: Speaking at a press conference at the airport, Sweeney thanked “the Universe for being so beautiful and good.” Which means that my boyfriend is a hippie. Which is just unacceptable. A mitigating factor, though, is his kickass collection of sweaters. The one he wore on CBS This Morning (above) made me melt, of course, but it was the Def Leppard sweatshirt at the end of the video, as he’s deboarding the plane, that clinches the deal. Any blond boy in Def Leppard-wear gets a free pass from me. Also: I love the little zit or scratch or mole on his forehead. SIGH.

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