Just Ask Joey

Dear Joey Life affirming! Yes, life affirming! This is what comes to mind when I read the WOW Report. It's beautiful words pick me up when I am down and smack me in the face when I am being a grumpy Gus. It takes a lot to win the title of life affirming as I feel not too many things are. The Beatles, freshly cut construction paper, a cool mountain breeze, and now The WOW Report all fall into my category of life affirming.

Unfortunately your column, if you can even call it a column, is far from life affirming. It's cynical Debbie downer bullshit takes my bad days and makes them worse. Have you ever considered getting a real job and stop trashing old folks? I'm not acting, dude. I'm straight and old and I envy the gay/young freedoms. I've considered going gay just to enjoy the freedoms but I am already old. And having people like you (i.e. gays who aren't actually gay but sadly mistaken by some douche bag as gay) put people like me (straight men who are older than dirt) into brackets pains me. I have a life. A straight, affirming, old life that shouldn't be judged by some guy named Joey. What kind of name is Joey anyway? Dissed. Brian

Dear Brian So I think the only real question in this whole ramble is, “What kind of name is Joey anyway?” Am I right? Yeah, yeah, I’m right, that’s the only question. WELL, Brian, Joey is short for Joseph and Joseph comes from the Bible. Can you remember who Joseph was, oh yeah, the FATHER of Jesus. Do you remember Jesus? I do, he died for your sins and now you get a three-day weekend in April every year because of it.

Now, in response to everything before the question, the rant if you will, I admit it, I am a TAD cynical. But you would be too if you grew up in Cleveland where it's grey outside for 9 months of the year. Not everyone can have a sunny disposition like yourself. But BRIAN, the clear difference between you and me is that I do not look to a website to affirm my life. I look to things that really make a difference, like, anything having to do with go-go dancers, what Becks might be up to, and, of course, the witty repartee of our own Stephen Saban (SHOUT OUT). Come to think about it, though, I can’t exactly pinpoint what things affirm my life, but I can tell you the WOW Report isn’t one of them. Now TMZ, that is some life affirming shit. Joey Maiocco

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