Ass Bandits

Twin gay porn stars turn to a life of crime! New Jersey natives Keyontyli and Taleon Goffney, 25, who use the noms de porn Keyon and Teyon, were arrested for a series of rooftop burglaries in South Philadelphia. And although many a gay man might admire the twins for their god-given endowments, it was the twins' other physical gifts that had even the arresting officers awestruck. Teyon is believed to have used his skills as a karate expert and trained gymnast to evade capture; during a recent escapade he allegedly jumped 30 feet from the roof of a liquor store and swam across the freezing Cooper River before being apprehended.

– AguynamedWayne

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