February 29, 2008
Ed Magaña's Friday Vid Bits
This week Ed favors us with Kurt Arve Washburn's "What a Party," a performance not as easily dismissed as you might at first think; a look back at the once-exclusive 3-D curiosity of Michael Jackson's 1980s Captain Eo; an ear-splitting syncopated remixed scene from TV's Bad Girls Club; and a heartwarming-turned-heartbreaking cautionary tale of a man-dog not properly leashed.
Rock the Vote
Barack Obama says his two daughters, Malia, 9, and Sasha, 6, are fans of Hannah Montana and Beyoncé, but think anything to do with Britney Spears and Paris Hilton is "yuck." Could be a deciding factor in choosing our next president.
Shakeup in Sheboygan
Leigh Robert, 38 (above left), who works in the Sheboygan, Wisconsin, school district, plans to marry Judy Stock, 51 (above right), in Canada next week. The women, who live in Kiel, are unable to marry legally in Wisconsin, and the Sheboygan Area School District has refused to grant two days of paid leave for Leigh Robert to marry another woman out of state. (Story continues; t/y Tom)
Feel the Bum
Yesterday evening I was on the treadmill, half-watching Janet Jackson on Larry King Live. They close-caption the telly in my gym so you can understand what's going on above the grunting and the whir of the machines. I glanced up at one point and was shocked to see Larry asking how Janet felt after she was bum-raped! JANET JACKSON WAS BUM-RAPED? Then I blinked the sweat out of my eyes and saw he was asking how she felt after getting BUM-RAPPED by the press. Oh well. On another note, did you see Janet trying to teach Larry King to dance?
– Steven Corfe
He's a Mac
Drew Barrymore and Justin Long frolic on the beach in Mexico, proving there's hope for mankind. (Photo: Bauer-Griffin via Just Jared)
One-Cent Post
Did anyone bother to find out if Nicole Richie could a) sing, b) dance, or c) act before offering her the lead role of Roxy Hart in the Broadway production of Chicago?
Sweet!
Us mag reported today that after taking in a screening of The Spiderwick Chronicles with the kids, sitting with regular people at the ArcLight in Hollywood, Angelina Jolie bought son Maddox a pack of I Heart My Penis gum in the gift shop. Oh, how they laughed. Not reported is the hat she bought for Daddy to wear when he gets back from Texas.
Ass Bandits
Twin gay porn stars turn to a life of crime! New Jersey natives Keyontyli and Taleon Goffney, 25, who use the noms de porn Keyon and Teyon, were arrested for a series of rooftop burglaries in South Philadelphia. And although many a gay man might admire the twins for their god-given endowments, it was the twins' other physical gifts that had even the arresting officers awestruck. Teyon is believed to have used his skills as a karate expert and trained gymnast to evade capture; during a recent escapade he allegedly jumped 30 feet from the roof of a liquor store and swam across the freezing Cooper River before being apprehended.
– AguynamedWayne
Defoliated
Brad Pitt's buzzcut on the Smithfield, Texas, set of his new film, Tree of Life (director Terrence Malick's sixth movie in 40 years), which also stars Sean Penn and is set to hit theaters next year. (via Just Jared; photos: Splash)
Recently Dead
Mike Smith, lead singer and keyboard player with The Dave Clark Five, died yesterday from pneumonia at Stoke Mandeville Hospital in Aylesbury, outside London. He was 64. A spinal cord injury in 2003 had left him paralyzed from the waist down. Sad to say, Smith, who was considered, like the Beatles' Paul, to be the cute one of the group, had been getting ready to travel to New York next week, where the band is to be inducted into the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame. The Dave Clark Five's hits include "Because," "Bits and Pieces," and "Glad All Over," which knocked the Beatles' “I Want to Hold Your Hand” off the top of the charts in 1963. (More)
February 28, 2008
As Screamed on TV
Make every day Take Chris Crocker to Work Day. On Crocker's MySpace there's a virtual boutique full of T-shirts with his legendary "Leave Britney Chris Crocker Alone!" mantra emblazoned on the front, as well as such other bon mots as "It's a Hairflip," "Bitch please!" and "Eat My Cornhole!" Collect 'em all. Makes a great gift.
Ark Angel
Joan Van Ark paid a visit this morning to the Today show along with some other gals and guys from Knots Landing, the third longest-running drama on TV. (Today's on a TV-reunion kick.) In the studio was stalwart Michelle Lee and slightly retarded Donna Mills, but it was so very much all about Van Ark, at least to the WOW Report. Here's a nifty, appropriately beige clip, in which Van Ark gets "verklempt" relating a story about her face.
The Day the Earth Stood Still Again
One chilly afternoon in London's Trafalgar Square, a massive group of volunteers, inspired by the outlaw troupe Improv Everywhere, assembled and, on cue, stopped in their tracks and stayed motionless for five minutes, further bewildering already-bewildered tourists. Never gets old.
Washington vs Hollywood
As a consultant for Svedka vodka, World of Wonder's head of development Tom Campbell was responsible for that poll mentioned in the USA Today story above. After the jump, see side-by-sides of America's choices for actors to play the three main presidential candidates in the unlikelihood there's a movie.
Ghost-riding* the DeLorean
This video truly has it all, says yesbutnobutyes: White guys break dancing, a guy with a prosthetic leg, and 88mph of pure '80s awesomeness. (via College Humor)
Homeland Insecurity
This toy airport security checkpoint set is so exactingly realistic to the last detail that it's no longer available on Amazon – for security reasons. Too bad, because the little rubber gloves were really cute. (via Popbitch)
Next Stop: Rehab
Down to the wire and losing the race, this hare needs a quick fix, and David at Pretty on the Outside came up with this look to make Hillary seem more, you know, amiable.
Security Chick
At Los Angeles International Airport yesterday, Renée Zellweger seemed tickled when she had to put her sneakers and carry-on liquids in the tray just like people who haven't won an Oscar. Perhaps she was researching a role. (Daily Mail; photo: Big)
Quote Unquote
“I've only ever had about three boyfriends. Only a handful of people have seen into the Pharaoh's Tomb! ... My best feature is unfortunately a private matter, although I'm told it is spectacular. But you can't really walk it down the red carpet. What can I say?" – Kate Beckinsale, talking about her "twat" to Allure magazine. (via Entertainmentwise)
Secret Service
It has come to light that bonnie Prince Harry has been secretly soldiering in Afghanistan since December, risking his life with the common blokes. The story of his service was leaked last month in, of all places, New Idea, an Australian women's magazine. "I am very disappointed that foreign websites have decided to run this story without consulting us," said Sir Richard Dannatt, head of the British army. "Now that the story is in the public domain, the chief of defense staff and I will take advice from the operational commanders about whether his deployment can continue." (Guardian; photo: John Stillwell/PA)
The Eyes Have It
Apparently, Amy Winehouse is not doing as well as expected after her stint in rehab and slew of Grammy awards. She may be back on drugs. A friend says she and Winehouse were sitting at a table when the singer purposely held her hand over a lighter and seared the skin, then screamed, “My life is a shell of what it was. People talk to me and I just zone out. It’s like the whole world is now stillborn. Colors aren’t as bright, love doesn’t feel real. I don’t know who I am and I just feel numb.” Add guitar, sax, and snare and it sounds like another Grammy-winner to us. (The Sun; photo: Big Pictures)
Itemizing
• Eminem's back in the studio and writing a book.
• Orlando Bloom stinks.
• Sam Lutfi's drugging of Britney Spears investigated by LAPD.
• Owen Wilson on another suicide mission with Kate Hudson?
• Ellen Page and Frankie Muniz hooked up?
• Jessica Simpson finds a captive audience.
• Josh Hartnett forced to fly coach. But his luggage was Coach.
February 27, 2008
Pup Culture: Wieners and Bacon
An Angelina Jolie of the wiener world introduces a new member into the family. (t/y Maggie)
Snap!
I've always been partial to English ass, and was delighted to learn it's now readily available at the school down the road from World of Wonder.
– Steven Corfe
Did Juno This About Ellen Page?
That's what we're talking about. Michael Musto is speculating on his La Daily Musto blog that perhaps Ellen Page should have been up for the Best Actor, not Actress, suggesting the Juno star is Lebanese. "Who did she go to the Oscars with?" he writes. "I couldn't tell from the cropped shots of her, but it looked like she was maybe with her mother? For guys, that used to signify 100% gay, but for girls, it might just mean young and/or Canadian – or, um, gay. And then there was the web item saying 'Ellen Page is an out lesbian.'" (La Daily Musto)
Sitings
Some of the entries to Cracked's photoshop contest, "Inappropriate Children's Book Covers." The editors apologize for being "tragically, horribly wrong" in having the idea.
Spice Boy
Breakdancing fiend Kid Becks aka Cruz Beckham, 3, stole the show from Mummy when she took him to work with her.
But First...
Randy Barbato and his best pal Clancy Cavnar are watching Big Brother 9, the special writers-strike winter edition, and have taken to emailng each other during the episodes. Following is an excerpt from their correspondence during last night's show, beginning with Amanda's request for sugar (RANDY CAPS, clancy lower case):
I NEED SUGAR
i just saw the part... i just need some sugar!
AMANDA IS THE NEW JANELLE!
as for the others
sheila: repulsive, must go
The OC: Outta Control
Mischa Barton, arrested December 27 in West Hollywood on DUI "suspicion," has been charged with driving under the influence, possession of marijuana, and driving without a valid license. When arrested, her car was traveling in two lanes and – worst of all, as far as we're concerned – she failed to signal when making a turn. She'll be arraigned tomorrow in Beverly Hills. (Peeps)
Two Heads Are Better Than Not Having One at All
And speaking of collaborations, Stephen King and John Mellencamp have finally teamed up and written the blues-tinged, guitar-driven, sultry Southern gothic mystery musical the theater world has been waiting for. Ghost Brothers of Darkland County opens in Atlanta at the Alliance Theatre next year. So obvious, it's a wonder they hadn't collaborated before. And doesn't it seem like Tyra Banks and Ashton Kutcher are perfectly suited to work together too? They've put their half-heads together to form a whole one and come up with a reality show involving contestants competing in a beauty pageant. Sounds fresh.
On the Same Page
The Olsen sisters, Ashley and Mary-Kate, are publishing a coffee-table book through Penguin Young Readers Group. Influence – unlike Paris Hilton's books of a few years ago, which were mostly blank – will actually have content. Ashley Olsen says the book will concern "“the most interesting, challenging, creative people we know – the ones who helped pave the way for us and our generation.” So who are those challenging road workers who sat for interviews with the twins? Christian Louboutin, Lauren Hutton, Terry Richardson, and Bob Colacello, among others. Sounds like a full house. Hope they didn't forget Uncle Jesse. (Us; photo: Getty)
Bite Me
Check out the new episode of WOW UK's Channel 4 online show, bite. This week, Antonya tries her hand at the trapeze, Ami sets fire to her record player, and Zena almost gets cryogenically frozen. Find out why at www.channel4.com/bite!
– Rachna Suri, producer
Grilled Cheese Up in Your Grille
Since you're probably in your car right now, looking at the WOW Report on your iPhone, and you haven't had breakfast yet, we've got just the product for you. The Road Pro Car Sandwich Maker plugs into your cigarette lighter and will cook up a toasted melted cheese sandwich, a tasty panini, or why not a batch of waffles before you hit your exit off the 101. (via Thrillist; t/y Chris)
One-Cent Post
Barak Obama refused to answer Us mag's question about his choice of boxers or briefs, saying, "I don't answer those humiliating questions. But whichever one it is, I look good in 'em!" But wethinks the question should be asked of Hillary.
Last Night, Today, and Tomorrow – on TV
LAST NIGHT...
Support Danny Noreiga on American Idol. Fag power! I love him!
And yes, yes, I know that David Archuleta is the bomb, and will win...all the more reason to support Danny and keep him in as long as we can!
TODAY...
Courtney today on Today. Can we talk? Cause she couldn't! Those lips! (Old lips in photo!)
TOMORROW...
Tomorrow on Today! OMG! JVA!
– Randy Barbato
Another Baby on the Woodpile
Britney Spears is pregnant with Adnan Ghalib's child. So says Star, who says Ghalib is bragging to friends just short of handing out cigars. Star says Spears is beginning to sho. Star also says a friend of the recently betrothed couple says, "Britney is Adnan's dream come true. He knows that if he has a child with Brit, he'll be made for life." Like K-Fed. (Photo: WENN)
February 26, 2008
Clothes Whores
Today's Clothes Whores winner is CJ Sagle, part-time Kanye West impersonator and full-time What Perez Sez editor. CJ rocks the Levolor-shade white sunglasses today in his sunny edit bay, but unlike Kanye who stalled production on his "Stronger" music video to fly to Paris and personally pick them up, CJ just nipped out to Hollywood Toys & Costumes on his lunch break and got them for $6.
– Steven Corfe
Harry Potter and the Kiss of the Cohost
When Daniel Radcliffe won the Newcomer of the Year trophy at the Whatsonstage Theatregoers' Choice Awards at the Lyric Theatre in London on Sunday night, he got more than the affection of the audience. The ceremony's cohost James Corden surprised him with a lengthy, romantic, hair-stroking kiss that Radcliffe eventually dissolved into, to the delight of those in attendance. Radcliffe has been quoted as saying, "I would love to be the first gay James Bond and Rupert [Grint] to be my first leading lady." Just saying.
TLS: Take Three
Jim Howley, one of the eight bachelors competing for Calpernia Addams' attention and affection on Logo's Monday-night dating series Transamerican Love Story, phoned into the World of Wonder offices again to dish the dirt on last night's episode. Listen to Jim's new voicemail here, and visit Jim's MySpace here.
Woodwork Squeaks
So now we know that all those yelps and cries Prince made in recent performances were actually the result of extreme hip pain and not sexual anxiety. Years of high heels and freaky moves on stage have taken their toll of the tiny talent's bones, and the only-47 Purple One has finally had to book himself into a private hospital to have his acetabulum replaced with titanium and space-age plastic. He's allotted himself two months to recuperate from the hip surgery. Says a source: "He is totally crushed because he knows he will never be the same again." Definitely not the same, better. (Daily Mail)
Lab Bratz
And speaking of the flesh-eating disease, what better way for your children to learn the dangers of playing with feces or lying in stagnant, larva-infested water than with these cuddly, plush petri dish friends (from left) ebola, black death, mad cow, sleeping sickness, flesh-eating, and typhoid fever. From Giant microbes. Collect 'em all!