Last year, my best friend and I got free tickets to see a taping of Megan Mullally's show. As an LA resident (like residents of most cities) I don’t go to many touristy things, but I figured what the hell. I liked the chick on Will & Grace, and it seemed like it would be a fun thing to do together. I was dead wrong. We had to stand in line for about an hour and, once inside, the horrible audience rouser told terrible jokes and kept popping up to force the audience to clap and cheer for things that were extremely unworthy. And when Megan finally dragged her sedated self out to the stage, she was unprepared and unentertaining. Her guests were Desperate Housewife Felicity Huffman, and one-hit-wonder singer/songwriter Daniel Powter. Megan basically had NO clue who Felicity was, and during the completely lame interview, where they talked mostly about their husbands, Megan said, “Felicity was in a small little indy movie that a lot of people haven’t seen, but it’s really entertaining if you get a chance to check it out.” That little indy movie was Transamerica and happened to earn the actress a little Oscar nomination and a little Golden Globe, not to mention several little critics’ awards. It was just kinda rude that she seemed so unprepared and uninterested, and my love for Megan quickly began to wane. My friend and I groaned in agony.
When Daniel Powter came out (no pun intended), he performed his hit song, “Bad Day.” When it was over, the show’s technical director came out and said there was an issue with the sound so he had to sing it again. He did. Then Megan came out and said they were still having difficulties so just bear with them, and he sang it again, and again, and again. Five times in a row. “Because you had a bad day. You’re taking one down. You sing a sad song just to turn it around. You say you don't know. You tell me don't lie. You work at a smile and you go for a ride. You had a bad day. The camera don't lie. You’re coming back down and you really don't mind. You had a bad day. You had a bad day." At the end of the epically long journey all we could do was laugh and emphatically agree with Daniel that it was, indeed, a bad day.
So as you all read this and wonder what the fuck is the point, I have to admit that I basically don’t know. I do, however, know that sometimes the experiences you have with someone, both good and bad, can create the tapestry of your relationship. Even though I have known my best friend since we were in about fifth grade, I could probably not tell you too many things about what makes her my best friend. She’s funny and nice, beautiful and smart, extremely successful and a delight to be around, but pinpointing exactly what makes her so special for me can be difficult to explain. What I can tell you is that all of the memories we've shared together have created a history that has defined our future. In the 15 years we've known each other, I think we may have had one bad day where we argued for a hot second.
That’s it. Fifteen years and only one bad day. That’s the kind of relationship everyone should have.
I’ve never understood why people stay in relationships with friends, loved ones, or partners where they fight or hurt each other. What's the point? Sure, we all have bad days, but why would we want to burden or hurt the people we care about just 'cause things don’t seem to be going our way. I've often said I think it's pathetic to be so desperate for a relationship that you're willing to settle for something you don’t necessarily want, but I guess I realize the reason I feel that way is that I already have these types of relationships. All of my friends and family that I've shared with and been close to will always be there, so I've been lucky enough to not have to worry about developing a boyfriend/girlfriend-type relationship without knowing for sure it’s the right one.
For graduation from college, my friend gave me this terrible picture frame with the words "My Memory Is Long, My Memory Is Very Long" (from that sappy movie Beaches), and quotes from all our times together. I look at it and realize that in many ways I am who I am because of her, and as cheesy as that sounds, it makes me happy.
A few weeks ago, her father died unexpectedly, and I felt every bit of her pain and wished I could go through it for her because I hated so much seeing her suffer. I realized then that all of those little memories that we'd shared had actually created a great bond that will never be broken.
Ok now you all are thinking, “Damn, reading this article was worse than having to sit through five renditions of 'Bad Day,'” but hopefully you'll realize that a good relationship is about getting through those bad days without causing pain to the ones you love. And if you have some bad experiences at least they will be creating a memory you can look back on and appreciate because you did it together. Oh, and by the way, that Megan Mullally show was cancelled after four months. BLOG HARD!