Blogrolling in the Valley

The production manager of Debbie Does Dallas...Again isn't the only crew member with a blog – Paul "PT" Thomas, director of Debbie and self-proclaimed "great genius," has also put fingertips to keyboard to write about his experiences remaking the classic porno, documented in WOW's new series of the same name. And by all accounts, PT was not amused when his role as director was threatened by new kid on the block Eon McKai. Catch the drama Fridays at 11PM on Showtime. And get a load, so to speak, of PT's blog right now:

I don't need my own goddamned company competing with me for talent, story ideas, locations or available funds. I need all the coddling and catering to I can get to pull another rabbit out of my hat. So, the news that Mr. Eon Schmeon McKai would be vying for Debbie honors with me, and would receive equal consideration within my own company, at first pissed me off.

I have one of the very best jobs in the world. I've had it for 25 years and with luck it will be my last job. So, as challenging, as tedious, as crazy as things might get, I have little room to complain. But still, like anyone else, can find plenty to bitch about....

"PT, I want you to do a remake of Debbie Does Dallas. I want it to be better than the original. I want you to use a lot of girls like the original Debbie." Said Steve, my boss for over two decades. He thinks I can just toss off one classic after another. He expects that every time I step out on the court I will deliver a slam dunk mega-hit. Well, it all sounds good on paper, in the comfort of his plush office, but out in the field, the reality of re-creating one of the most successful adult films ever can get real sticky.

The temptation is always to take the subject matter in a different direction that the original. To put one's own stamp on this classic. I wanted to make it darker,more serious,more deeply intense. "Let's look into Debbie's psyche, find out what makes her tick.

Maybe explore her worst fears, expose her. Maybe a psychological thriller. Debbie Does the Dark."

"No,no no Pt...I want to stay within the same light, humorous spirit of the original," said Steven. "Don't make Debbie into The Masseuse.* The audience has expectations from Debbie. Let's not let them down." So, putting my comedy hat on but still intent on creating an approach of my own, still wanting to look a little deeper into Debbie's head than the original, I started working on the story and the casting - which always go hand in hand.

Having all these gorgeous Vivid Girls at my beck and call can be a mixed blessing. These thoroughbreds that we look so hard to find each come with a personal litany of do's and don'ts that must be considered.

Professional behavior takes on different meaning in an adult film. As much as I'd like to simply demand that the girls learn their lines, come to the set on time, and do precisely what I tell them, when real hard core sex is on the line there is often compromise involved. Each girl has her list of guys and girls she is willing to have sex with, as well as which sexual practices she will engage in. For instance.. Stefani will have sex with two guys at once but will not fuck one again after she has fucked the other, and only at night as the last scene of the day - and no anal, forget it. Monique prefers one on one; if multiple partners are involved she would rather a girl and a guy; if any rough treatment is needed she wants to be the one to dish it out; she will do anal but insists on 6" or less; and on and on ad infinitum, ad nauseum. On top of that, consider that there are precious few guys who can walk, talk, and chew gum and who are cool enough to make the cut, and you get an inkling of the challenges I have in casting.

But I need all the cooperation of the very best our industry has to offer.

It felt an unnecessary burden. Why ruffle the feathers of the great genius (me) just as he is discovering his creative muse for Debbie? And what the fuck is "Alt Porn" anyway? Punk rock, Jonny Rotten, Jack Kerouac, Alan Ginsberg, Betty Page wannabees. Ain't nothin' new under my sun, just repackaged Warhol. "OK, I can use this," I thought. Use this to spur my competitive instincts. Some young pseudo-hip buck thinks he's gonna usurp moi, the most awarded schmuck ever, still in my prime (we'll discuss that later)? Stevie baby, leave with the the bitch who you brought to the dance! Problem is this Eon Mckai is just too likeable. He actually seems to respect me. He actually seems to know a thing or two abut a thing or two. So hey, I've got every penny from my Bar Mitzvah saved, I have no reason to feel insecure. So why not make the best of my new in-house, would-be king.....and then pull the rug out from under him.

I'm Paul Thomas goddamnit! I'll think of something...Stay Tuned on this one.

I hope you are beginning to understand some of the challenges that go into getting the very best out of these high strung pedigrees. When hard core sex (and a lot of it) is thrown into the cauldron of normal filmmaking problems, you have a very combustible little circus.

– Paul "PT" Thomas

* The Masseuse is a film PT directed in 2004 starring Jenna Jameson as a rubdown expert who decides to expand her business. We'll leave it to you to find out how. The dark, moody film has been hailed as an instant classic, sweeping the AVN Awards that year and spawning five sequels in just two years.

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