June 30, 2006
BURNS UNIT: SPECIAL REPORT
Yes, Perez, Pete Burns is a free man and he's in our clutches.
WOW has been filming his every move since his eviction from the slammer, after a mystery donor stumped up the cash. Pete was detained at Her Majesty's pleasure for a shocking total of 60 days, though with all those horrible grunts around it "felt like an eternity." As Pete pointed out as he was sped away from the gates of Wandsworth Prison, hidden from paparazzi by the tinted windows of a 4X4, "some murderers and rapists get less time than that." What Pete was in there for in the first place is totally beyond our comprehension, but we are sure to get to the bottom of it.
Pete's got to stay outside the perimeter of London's M25. No, we didn't know such a place existed either. Is it like Narnia? Anyway, thank goodness for the rural and adoring fan who wrote to Pete in prison offering support and is now making him breakfast in bed.
Next up, Pete returns to london with special dispensation to get some cosmetic tune-up.
– UK team
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Comments
-- Bunny ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://worldofwonder.net/nav-commenters.gif)
| June 30, 2006 11:50 AM
Bunny, I'm not quite sure what you mean by, "as if the plastic surgery wasn't enough..." - are you aware of what exactly happened to Pete?
Pete was injected in his lips with a solution that caused his lips to - literally and very painfully - explode. It wasn't only his lips that were damaged; the solution spread throughout his body causing non-malignant tumours and he had to undergo 18 months of reconstructive surgery, during which he went into renal failure and nearly died several times. It's no laughing matter.
"Never judge a person until you have walked a mile in their shoes".
-- Karen | July 1, 2006 5:54 AM
When he was in the UK Big Brother house there was a huge controversy about his monkey fur coat. At the time there was talk about bringing charges against him for violating the endangered species act - is that why he was in jail for 60 days?
As if the plastic surgery wasn't enough, it seems he's still trying to exemplify the term 'fashion victim'