June 30, 2005
Sitings
• Elvis vs JXL: A Little Less Conversation. Where's the vs exactly?
• Woman in bikini falling around giant orbs. Use your cursor to help her. (t/y Pam)
• Don't worry, it's medical. (t/y Eduardo)
• Feed Lindsay merchandise. Because we care. (t/y Nelson)
Prison Blues
Rules. No drinking coffee on the New York subway. No white after Labor Day. No smoking in California prisons. What?! Hey, we don't like murdering, stealing, raping criminals anymore than the next person, but we think that once they've been thrown into prisons for the rest of their lives they should be allowed to smoke cigarettes in their stinking cells. In California we aren't allowed to smoke anywhere at all, even in the very loose-lifestyle environs of the WOW building; some of us here have daydreamed of being sent to prison where cigarettes are as regulation as the boxer shorts, toothbrush, and anal sex. But starting Friday, Folsom State Prison will be a smoke-free facility. And that includes inmates and staff alike. We smell a riot comin' on. (LA Times)
Judging from the experience of other states — and reports from a few California prisons that are already smoke-free — health costs will go down. But their experience also shows that forcing inmates to kick the habit has downsides.
Oh, Really
Chancing upon Oprah's website, we found out what the kids are up to these days. When we were a kid, "hoovering" was one of our chores.
Tossing Salad: giving oral sex anally.
Rainbow Parties: Oral sex parties. Girls put on different-colored lipstick and each puts her mouth around the penis of a boy who is there to receive favors.
Pretty Boy: A sexually active boy; a player.
Dirty: A girl who has an STD; a diseased girl.
High Five: A person who is HIV positive (High V).
Booty Call: An early morning or late night call that involves no relationship or emotional attachment.
Hoovering: An abortion.
Outercourse: Oral sex.
Celebrities at Large
We were coming out of Borders just now, the one at Sunset and Vine, after buying Jerry Stahl's I, Fatty, a novel about Fatty Arbuckle, when we ran smack into a celebrity sighting, if we can call it that. Standing on the sidewalk thisclose to the door and making it difficult for shoppers to navigate, was Richard Rubin, that irritating Woody Allen geek from Beauty and the Geek. He was whining to another geek, a regular one who's not on TV, about how he likes to have fun. Richard and Mindy, the beauty he's paired with, have probably already won the $250,000, which is a shame because Richard has singlehandedly ruined that once-moving reality show, the same way those bandanna-headed jocks spoiled last season's Big Brother.
Sonja, Kicking and Screaming
Sixteen-year-old soccer player Sonja Roberson and her family, from Loganville, Georgia, were followed by the WOW cameras for three months for Sports Kids Moms & Dads, then cut from the broadcast and used in a series of compelling "webisodes" that follow the Wednesday airings. Now, after licking her wounds, the fleet-of-foot teen has been enlisted by the WOW Report to review the Bravo series, mouthing off in podcasts after each episode, which she watches at home with her mom & dad and younger sister. Call it Sonja's revenge.
Listen here to Sonja's review of Sports Kids episode 5.
Pretty Poker Face
Oscar-nominated actress Jennifer Tilly beat out 600 women to win first place – and $158,635 and the coveted bracelet – in the ladies no-limit Texas Hold 'Em championship event at the World Series of Poker being held at the Rio hotel and casino in Las Vegas. She was the first celebrity ever to win the top prize, and she was playing against some pretty tough female customers. Tournament media director Nolan Dalla said of Tilly, "She showed an incredible amount of talent. She had an enormous chip lead and never looked back." The actress attributes her win to her boyfriend, poker professional Phil "Unabomber" Laak. (MSNBC)
“When you’re living with Phil, you kinda learn by osmosis,” Tilly told CardPlayer.com. “Even in the middle of the night, he wakes up screaming out poker terms. Most guys scream out other girls’ names.”
Of Interest
NY Times reporter Judith Miller and Desperate Housewives actress Harriet Sansom Harris. Well, what about them?
The Affner-Garfleck Wedding
Even though the National Enquirer reported that Ben Affleck and his pregnant lady Jennifer Garner secretly married last night at a West Indies resort, Affleck's spokesman, Ken Sunshine, has been denying it for days. The Enquirer said the couple flew with Garner's Alias costar Victor Garber to Parrot Cay and were wed in full view of the tab's witnesses, then were leaving for Garner's family home in West Virginia. Sunshine has said they are not married and not in West Virginia. "They did not get married yesterday," he said. "They did not get married today." Yet it's obvious they did and it really can't be denied and who really cares. "I'm not confirming, I'm not denying, I'm not commenting," says Sunshine, still.
The Night Watch
Dancing With the Stars (ABC) - I will not be watching the finale next week. Don't get me wrong, I love this show, but without Rachel Hunter and Joey McIntyre, why watch the finale? Who wants to see that girl from a soap opera or that guy from a sitcom? Joey and Rachel ruled.
Intervention (A&E) - Has anyone noticed that this show is sponsored by Home Depot? Seems odd to me, considering the 24-hour Home Depots are notorious late-night gathering spots for tweakers eager to pick up window dressings (and each other).
I Want to Be a Hilton (NBC) - It's all about Latricia. Last night when she complained about Yvette working her "reserve nerve," I thought, Get rid of Kathy Hilton and re-name the show I Want to Be Latricia.
Beauty and the Geek (WB) - The theme song is a Pet Shop Boys track. Do you think Ashton listens to a lot of Pet Shop Boys?
Blow Out (Bravo) - Jonathan Antin's hair. Discuss.
– Randy Barbato
June 29, 2005
The Executioner's Bark
You don't say no to Tom Cruise if you know what's good for you. Scarlett Johansson was not interested in marrying a movie star just yet so she recently, and famously, turned heel and left Cruise standing at the Scientology altar. Then later, bizarrely, officials at Paris' Charles DeGaulle airport (trust us, you never want to be there) almost euthanized the actress's teacup Chihuahua, Maggie, when she was passing through on her way to London to shoot a Woody Allen movie (has Allen had it with New York?). They thought the dog wasn't fit to travel and should be put to sleep, which seems overly harsh, right? After some panic on Johansson's part, the situation was settled and Maggie's execution was reprieved. We're not saying exactly that Cruise had anything to do with it, we're just saying. (digital spy)
(Photo: Johansson with twin brother Hunter and Maggie)
Snap! Cap
Skydiving lessons: $50
Nude Aerialists of America membership: $69
Airplane rental: $200
Failure to fully comprehend the gravity of the situation: Priceless
(Brad)
Of Interest
Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Connelly, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jennifer Grey, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Jennifer Beals, Jennifer Coolidge, Jennifer Tilly, Jennifer Garner... Cheese 'n' rice! Whatever happened to the Heathers? There was even that movie. Now it's all Donna and Jennifer. Well, there is that one Heather, Heather Havrilesky, who writes that TV column, I Like to Watch, for Salon.
Heather Havrilesky and Gillian Anderson. Well, what about them?
Horse Maneuver
Tonight, on episode 5 of Sports Kids Moms & Dads, Karen give the girls some surprising news about Karli and Disco's future, Bryce finally gets his chance to perform at the Jr Nationals, TJ puts Lindsay on lockdown, and Sarah faces her toughest competition to date. 10PM, Bravo.
(Bravo Sports Kids schedule)
Pretty Poison
Q: What do a pretty shower curtain, a Chinese take-out container, and the little girl who dies in Don't Look Now have in common?
A: They're all coated in cancer.
According to an outside advisory report to the Environmental Protection Agency, the chemical perfluorooctanoic acid is seeping into humans, most likely from the water-and-grease-repellent coatings on shower curtains, slickers, take-out containers, and rugs, and is most likely causing cancer in the US. (GrandForks)
Diss Play
These posters are up on a hoarding around a construction site on the corner of Las Palmas and Hollywood Boulevard, inviting natives and tourists to vote on whether Bob Ross, Taz, Yanni, and Chucky are chill or not chill. And we're wondering if the posters are chill or not chill.
Ad Subtract
A blogger using the name "a v" has launched ad-free versions of Gawker and Page Six (stripped also of its registration policy). We're not saying it's right or anything, we're just saying it's weird to see those blogs in a diffferent light and you should probably take a look at them while they're still up, 'cause you never know who's gonna get litigious. Actually, you do know (remember Perez Hilton?). a v has said in an email to AdRants:
This is a piece of performance art meets media. We wanted to see if we can draw viewership away from popular online blogs and news sites by removing the advertising. Would people actually enjoy the site more without the pop up advertising, drag overs, and other obtrusive types of online banner advertising?
Plus most people read the NY POST for the Gossip only so to us it was interesting to note that and really expose the NY POST for the right wing rag that it is. Also we have come to the conclusion that the registration process adopted by the POST was done in an effort to collect emails. We do not endorse spam dealers or peddlers!
Hole Hitler!
Adolf Hitler, who caused so much misery in the '30s and '40s, came up with something in 1941 that is still popular today. Not just hatred and discrimination, but the sex doll. The inflatable toy festooned with orifices was an invention of Der Fuhrer, who dispensed them to his armies for when the urge came over them and they were sick and tired of sex with bunkmate Dieter. (ynet news)
Hitler himself provided the measurements and design for the doll: "She should be a natural size with a pretty woman's appearance with white skin, blonde hair, blue eyes, 1.76 meters (5 feet, nine inches) high, with large lips and breasts." The doll was meant to serve the sexual needs of the German fighting man, who might otherwise go to brothels and contract a sexual transmitted disease – or worse, have sex with non-Aryan women and thus pollute the race.
Well, She Was Good at Chemistry
In the Observer piece about Prince Harry cheating on his exam at Eton, there is this hilarious (to us) bit about a prior scandal at the school.
Eton is no stranger to scandalous allegations, nor to claims that it tries to prevent them leaking out. As long ago as the 1920s, MI5 was dispatched to investigate rumours that the American actress Tallulah Bankhead was seducing its pupils. The headmaster at the time, Dr CA Alington, stepped in to prevent the racy allegations leaking out.
Like Father
You'd think a tape of someone admitting they had cheated on an exam would be enough to prove that they had cheated on an exam. But when it's England and that someone is Prince Harry, the school in question just retaliates by calling the accusing teacher a "zombie" and "at best semi-articulate" and everyone thinks that good old Harry was just saying he cheated to annoy her. The trial concludes next week.
Today, crazy Simone Simmons has revealed that Diana was forced to have a DNA test to prove Harry was Charles'. Disappointingly for us, and possibly also for Harry, he was.
– Tim Hancock
June 28, 2005
Sitings
• Podcast with Warhol legend Holly Woodlawn on Feast of Fools. (t/y Robert)
• Really ripped women. Aren't they? NSFW.
• Peter Jackson's King Kong: The Trailer. (via Golden Fiddle)
Remote Possibility
Janice Crouse, a senior fellow at Concerned Women for America, which describes itself as a conservative Evangelical group of 500,000 members, said the launching of MTV Network's gay channel, Logo, was "a sad day for America," adding that it was "unconscionable," given the weight MTV has to influence youth, to present a promiscuous lifestyle that causes "illnesses and diseases" in a positive light. Well, God bless her and her concerned Christian ladies. We're just thrilled that the estimated 15 million-and-growing gays in the US can piss off their 500,000 and cause them sleepless, fretful nights. Boo! Logo launches this Thursday. (Reuters)
The Basement Tapes
Mary Harron, you say? Well, yes. She's got that American Psycho film she directed coming out on a new, uncut, collector's special edition DVD with James St. James and Michael Musto chatting in the extras. But here, in this never-before-seen, unfinished WOW film, RuPaul: The Movie, documenting RuPaul's two-week stint on the boards in Las Vegas back in 1995, Harron is simply the journalist who lobs some hardball questions at Ru backstage. Where is Ru's hurt? Find out when you watch the clip.
Snap! Cap
With a lick of my mighty tongue, I hereby banish you to the alternate universe. (madmoham)
For Your Consideration
A panel of WOW-staffers was convened recently to take a look at the inventive packaging that the Emmy screeners come wrapped in. We have a few voters in residence here, so we decided to give the best and worst arrivals to our office our own award – the most prestigious and rare Wowie statuette. We'll be doling out a couple or so every day.
And the WOWIE AWARD FOR MOST GERIATRIC PACKAGING goes to A&E. Their package included an entire set of DVDs and VHS, clearly catering to older voters. And the color palette is very early '80s, colors you would imagine in bathrooms of older successful TV producers (and voters) living somewhere in Bel Air.
And the WOWIE AWARD FOR PACKAGING THAT NEEDS SOME ATTENTION goes to E!. This screams, Don't pay attention to me! We haven't even opened it. Having said that, it does have a picture of John Ritter on the cover, so that's sure to win a lot of sympathy votes.
Our other Wowie recipients:
Most Presumptuous Packaging: HBO
Packaging That Will Get the Most Money on eBay: America's Next Top Model
Most Fun Packaging: The Amazing Race
Most Functional Packaging: Without a Trace
Tricksiest Packaging: Arrested Development
Best Lo-Tech Packaging: BBC America's The Office
Most Tasteful Packaging: Lifetime
Least Pretentious Packaging: The Daily Show
Most Fashion-Forward Packaging: Sci Fi
Most Improved but Not Quite There Yet Packaging: Showtime
Shameless Plug
Tonight, Tuesday, June 28, the WOW Report's resident musicologist and deejay, Bill Coleman (Peace Bisquit's Hi-Five), will be spinning with Kaz Gamble (of Cooler Kids and boygirL) at Monroe's, 8623 Melrose Avenue in West Hollywood. No cover. Also on the bill are boygirL (10PM), the LA premiere of Daisy Spurs (11PM), and Mynx (midnight).
The critics rave:
"LA-based duo boygirL is so sexy and infectious that you won't be able to deny it." – Amber Drea, Venus zine
"The Daisy Spurs are like the uber-sexy downtown version of OutKast on steroids. I would book the crunkadelic stage show any chance I could." – Larry Tee, Electroclash founder, legendary DJ, superstar
"Mynx is a ferocious musical creature...(who) has produced one of the most infectious and anthemic songs of the year, 'I'm So LA,' an electro-pop gem." – M Lavandeira, Vice magazine
(Photo: Daisy Spurs)
Nailed
Our favorite couple of yestermonth, Corey Clark and Paula Abdul, is in the news again but, unfortunately, not as a couple. Clark was cited on a misdemeanor battery charge when an argument he was having with his manager in a Sacramento hotel room expanded into a food fight. Both Clark and Laura Kathleen Troy – scratched and disheveled – were cited, released, and drove off together in a van. Abdul, also not felonious, made an appearance in a San Francisco court, testifying about an experience she had with an unsanitary manicure in a nail salon that left her thumb in excruciating pain. She wants to establish safety standards for manicure and pedicure equipment and rewrite state regulations on salon cleanliness. "Being a professional dancer, I'm no stranger to pain," she said, "but this time the pain was so excruciating that even my hair touching my thumb caused me to scream." What hair would that be, then, Paula? "I was publicly humiliated," she says of the late-night-TV jokes made about her (thumb?). "That is why with an open heart and a selfless agenda, I implore you to pass this bill."
The English Nose
Those who have read her "tell-all" book are saying that Princess Diana's "energy healer" Simone Simmons claims that Diana used cocaine at Dodi's insistence. “It made her feel so ill," Simmons writes. "It made her feel sick, dizzy and breathless. She felt she was going to have a heart attack and die when she tried cocaine.” So, as expected, Dodi had the good stuff. But what next will we learn from Simmons about the late princess? That she ate her own pooh and liked to fondle the servants? (Scotsman)
Catching Some Rays
We're not doctors here, nor lawyers, but this smacks of negligence and abuse. A 49-year-old woman with multiple sclerosis was essentially burned to death by the sun's rays when she was left sunbathing on the patio of a Waterville, Ohio, "care" facility for hours in 95-degree heat. Her body temperature reached 109 degrees. Yes, you can tan to death. Staff claim they checked on her periodically, but since her condition made moving difficult and dangerously increased her sensitivity to heat, perhaps an extra "How are we doing?" might have saved her life. (Washington Times)
Notes from Underground
New York City subway riders now find that it's suddenly illegal, against the law, and forbidden to:
• sip coffee or soda
• move between cars while train is in motion
• rest feet on the seats
• straddle a bicycle
• ride a skateboard or wear inline skates
There is only one way... to move safely to another car – exiting the train at the next station and then quickly re-entering it, even if passengers making a such a dash could face other perils, like tripping, smashing a finger or losing a purse between rapidly shutting doors.
Violating the new rules can result in fines from $25 to $100. A 30-year-old woman who works as a newspaper distributor in Midtown told the New York Times that she was riding a Brooklyn-bound No. 3 train on Wednesday when a man began masturbating in front of her. "I thought, 'I've got to get off this train,' " she recalled. "Now I'm going to get a fine for that, for running from a flasher? I won't pay it!" They're a total nightmare, the new subway rules. Thank God we live in LA, where our only worry is getting shot to death on the freeway or bored to death when we get there.
Pimp My Grandfather
A man from Loughbourough, a small town in middle England, noticed there was something fundamental missing from his grandfather's wheelchair. That was a set of alloy wheels. And a bangin' sound system. And a blue flame paint job. And a PlayStation. No one messes with him no more.
– Tim Hancock
Baaaad Things to Come
Probably the worst craze Britain has ever experienced is currently at its peak – literally just a computer animated frog wearing goggles making the sound of a motorbike. Unbelievably, after starting as just a ringtone TV advert campaign, the Crazy Frog managed to stay at number 1 in the singles charts for three weeks (after they had to spend thousands putting a black censoring bar over his tiny penis on the video).
And now, as the hot weather continues to keep our tastes aligned with Southern Europeans, another track is beginning to seep into the mainstream. It is a sheep bleating the national song, Jerusalem. It is tipped for the top of the charts.
They will try this in America. Resist.
– Tim Hancock
June 27, 2005
World Party
Here's another DVD of Party Monster with different cover art for your collection of Party Monster DVDs from around the world – and we know you obsessives are out there. This one's from Australia, mate. That makes, what, 17? Next edition: the Grand-Duchy of Luxembourg.
Celebrities at Large
While waiting in line for brunch at Dottie's in San Francisco over the weekend, we spotted actress Bebe Neuwirth wearing a leopard print jacket & yelling at a fan as she left the diner. Accosting the woman, Bebe shouted, "It's really rude to stare at someone, even if you recognize them. Fuck off!" Like telling the woman to fuck off was less rude. Hmm, Lilith from Cheers is a cold bitch... Who knew?
– Chris McKim
Ba Da Bing Dynasty
A friend visiting Shanghai sent us this Sopranos DVD packaging with its inscrutable description of the HBO series, in French and English. Here's how the English reads (all of it sic):
The storyu begins with the ascension to heaven of the Longevity Monk and his three disciples, including the infamous Monkey king aflr they bring back the Buddhist scpptures from India.monkey king cannot resest the temptations of doing mischidf, and as a penalty, both he and his master are aent back to earth as humajn mortals to make a further trip to India. The devils are thtilled when ther learn about this. They are alll preying upon the Longevity Monk, wnose flesh, it is rumoure, willgrart Longevity,So devils assemble at Fingers Morntain and await their prey......
Since the French copy is unrelated to the English – something about France in the 18th century and Penelope Cruz – we figure it must be dummy copy.
Talking About My TransGeneration
Thairin Smothers: We love San Fran and Frameline. Having a break this morning from a grueling morning of interviews after last night's premiere sprinkled with two standing ovations. There was something really magical about the whole experience and was glad to have shared that with the cast and crew family. I was speechless, so I just did a little dance on stage – the energy was just that good. Jeremy, what were your thoughts?
Jeremy Simmons: The magic moment was when we were inviting the students to come on stage and, as they walked down the aisle, row after row began to stand up and cheer. This is what it's all about. A single moment where it all comes together and makes it worth everything we've been working for. I was high for the rest of the nite. Any other thoughts, Thairin?
Thairin: Jeremy, you are right, the Castro is the best joint! Another good moment was that Raci's family was there and brought her a tootbrush and toothpaste and handed it to her on stage and told her not to forget to brush her teeth. That put a smile on my face.
Tammy and the Bachelors
Tammy Faye: Death Defying is one of three films World of Wonder had at the Frameline fest in SF. Fenton Bailey filed this report.
Director Chris Mckim clutched the hand of producer Alicia Gargaro as they took to the stage looking like sweethearts. Extremely glamorous sweethearts. The moment Tammy Faye entered the auditorium the crowd was on its feet. Tammy wore pink for "Pink Saturday" (although almost everyday of the week Tammy manages to work some pink into her wardrobe). In a Q&A after the rapturously received film, Tammy somehow managed to charm the audience while confessing that she didn't believe in gay marriage – only because she's "an old-fashioned kind of girl." After a blast on the theater's organ, she braved the crowds outside and encountered what might be her first ever dyke march, replete with topless lesbians. Over a not-so-quiet dinner interrupted by photographers and autograph hounds, the waiter – in full Munster drag (white face, red lips, black bangs) – put his hand on Tammy's shoulder while taking her order and said, "I forget your name, honey." It was kind of sweet.
(Photo: Alicia Gargaro, Chris McKim, and Tammy Faye on stage after the screening)
Frame in Focus
Greetings from Palm Beach, starts Maurice Bonamigo's letter to the WOW Report, which follows:
On Thursday, June 23, I boarded American Airlines from Miami to San Francisco for the Frameline Film Festival for the screening of our famous World of Wonder film, Gay Republicans, which was to be shown on Friday evening. I arrived in San Francisco at 10:45 and was quickly taken to the Hotel Vitale where Frameline was gracious enough to house me for the 2-day stay. I have to say, this Hotel is fabulous. The staff could not do enough to make sure that I was kept happy and comfortable. (People often wonder if I am high maintenance. Well, I am not; I am just fortunate and misunderstood.)
My dear friend and producer, Anne Clements, arrived a couple of hours later. We met up and quickly headed off for lunch, cosmopolitans, and scotch, known as our "life support." After several hours of catching up over cocktails, it was back to the hotel to freshen up before our dear friend, director Wash Westmoreland, arrived for dinner along with other friends in the film industry. I have to say San Francisco knows how to make divine cosmopolitans and pour fabulous triple scotches. Oh yes, the food is always good wherever you go.
(More after the jump)
More...Night of the Panting Dead
At Pittsburgh's Safar Centre for Resuscitation Research, boffins have developed a technique in which subjects are killed and then brought back from the dead. Their veins are drained of blood and filled with an ice-cold salt solution, at which time breathing, heartbeat, and brain activity stop. They're officially dead. Three hours later, the blood is replaced and the subjects' are brought back to life with electric shock. Sure, the subjects are dogs right now – zombie dogs, in fact – but it's just a matter of time before humans replace dogs in the unearthly experiments. And Pittsburgh, you'll remember, is where George A Romero makes his films. Coincidence? (News.com.au)
Boffin n. (Chiefly British slang) A scientist, especially one engaged in research.
Dollhouse of Horrors
Toddlerpede (left) by Johnny Beinart, medical doll and pickled teddy by Edward String. (beinart.com)
WTF?
This ad, which appeared in the LA Times Calendar section over the weekend, showing Mrs Smith shitting the Bewitched stars out of her ass, can not have been an accident.
What's New on IDT?
Says Fenton Bailey: I've just got back from deep throating Australia. Ba dum bum. I had a thorough oral workout giving about 50 interviews in five jam-packed days. The joy of being asked the same sorts of questions over and over again is that you end up with fresh insights about something you thought you'd exhausted. Like, for example, the idea that Deep Throat is a film about the closet, and that the closet is still the political issue of our times. (For the rest of Bailey's thoughts, go here.)
Shake (Off) Your Groove Thang
We knew this all along. Didn't you? The object of writer Terry McMillan's affection, the young man she married six years ago, the guy who got her groove back, has turned out to be a big gay. That's right, a homo. Jonathan Plummer, the now-30-year-old Jamaican who the now-53-year-old McMillan swooned over in her autobiographical novel, How Stella Got Her Groove Back, is in court trying to undo the prenup agreement. Apparently, her groove was 78 rpm and his was a compact disc. It's real ugly. (SFGate)
In an interview, Plummer insisted that he didn't know he was gay when he met McMillan in June 1995 at a Jamaican resort. Nor, he says, did he seize on the author's fame. "I was a 20-year-old kid when I met her and had no idea that she was anybody other than an attractive, older woman,'' he said in court papers.
Recently Dead
Sixties rock 'n' roll impresario Chet Helms died Saturday of complications from a stroke. He was 62. Helms was instrumental in the creation of the San Francisco Sound and is the father of 1967's Summer of Love. As the Vietnam War battled on, he staged free concerts and trippy, patchouli-scented Human Be-ins in Golden Gate Park. He launched the thrilling but short-lived experience that was Janis Joplin when he introduced her to Big Brother and the Holding Company, and can be held responsible also for the careers of Jefferson Airplane, Country Joe and the Fish, Quicksilver Messenger Service, and the Grateful Dead. Dead drummer Mickey Hart said, "Chet was a hippie. He hated to charge for the music." We miss that. (AP via Death Beeper)
(Photos: Jay Blakesberg)
She's Back (and Front)
The lady with the breasts in the Justice Department who embarrassed extreme Christian Attorney General John Ashcroft so much when she was positioned behind him at press conferences that he had her ample bosoms covered, has at last been undraped. The new attorney general, Alberto Conzales, agreed to lift the veil on the Spirit of Justice, as the aluminum statue is called. Now there's liberty and justice for all – to see – in the Great Hall. (BBC News)
Before being covered, the statues offered rich pickings for press photographers working at the Justice Department, who often crouched on the floor to capture politicians in shot with an exposed aluminium breast. Perhaps the most famous photograph of the statue is a 1986 photograph of Edwin Meese brandishing a copy of his report on pornography with Spirit of Justice clearly visible in the background.
Best-Laid Plans
Princess Diana (left) supposedly told this lady, "energy healer" Simone Simmons (right), "I want you to promise that one day you'll write the book about me. They'll say I'm the nutty princess. I want you to tell it the way it is." Because Di knew that a book written by an energy healer would be taken seriously and remove any lingering thoughts we might have that the princess was nutty. Now Simmons has kept her promise. In her book, Diana: The Last Word, she claims that Diana spent a night of "pure lust" in a New York hotel room with JFK Jr, rating him a 10 out of 10 in the sack. And it seems the once-future queen of England had designs on becoming America's future first lady.
Recently Dead
The voice of Tigger, Gargamel, and Boomer is dead. Ventriloquist Paul Winchell, 82, died in his sleep Friday. Growing up, Winchell's idols had been Edgar Bergen and his wooden friend, Charlie McCarthy; later, when he had his own act, with dummies Jerry Mahoney and Knucklehead Smiff, Winchell surpassed Bergen by not moving his lips when the dummies were speaking. Learning to "throw" his voice helped him overcome a speech impediment he developed from an early bout with polio. The handsome Winchell was a popular sitcom and game show guest on television in the '50s and '60s and hosted a couple of his own shows. He was handy with acupuncture and hypnosis and, as a prolific inventor, came up with an early version of the artificial heart, as well as a disposable razor, a flameless cigarette lighter, and an invisible garter belt. But today he's probably most remembered for those cartoon voices he created for Disney and Hanna-Barbera. (Mercury News)
June 24, 2005
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For Your Consideration
A panel of WOW-staffers was convened recently to take a look at the inventive packaging that the Emmy screeners come wrapped in. We have a few voters in residence here, so we decided to give the best and worst arrivals to our office our own award – the most prestigious and rare Wowie statuette. We'll be doling out a couple or so every day.
And the WOWIE AWARD FOR THE MOST FASHION-FORWARD PACKAGING goes to the SCI FI network for their white lucite bookends. Yes, white lucite, inside a dark blue rice paper envelope. Nice.
And the WOWIE AWARD FOR THE MOST IMPROVED BUT NOT QUITE THERE YET PACKAGING goes to SHOWTIME. It's big, but not too big. It's classy, but not quite as modern as you would hope it to be. Burgandy? What's up with the burgandy textured case; when we think Showtime, we don't think burgandy. But the inset with the translucent textured bookcover is nice and shows enormous promise. We suspect they'll be a slam dunk next year.
Our other Wowie recipients so far:
Most Presumptuous Packaging: HBO
Packaging That Will Get the Most Money on eBay: America's Next Top Model
Most Fun Packaging: The Amazing Race
Most Functional Packaging: Without a Trace
Tricksiest Packaging: Arrested Development
Best Lo-Tech Packaging: BBC America's