Posted by: James St. James contact

Well it looks like I'm off to Varmland

See ya around, suckers. The Huffington Post did a roundup of the world's hottest royals. You know the drill: Harry, William, Zara Philips, and OF COURSE Princess Grace's horse-faced grandson Andreas Casiraghi (who was EXTREMELY hot 10 years ago, but now has Prince William Syndrome, poor dear). As you all are well aware: I'm husband hunting. It's my goal to be someone's trophy wife PLEASE GOD JUST ONCE BEFORE I DIE PRETTY PLEASE? Let me be some rich man's arm candy.  It's not too much to ask. Now, the one that I really want is the hottie at left: Hamden bin Mohammed al Maktoum, the Crown Prince of Dubai. I think I'd make a MARVELOUS Princess of Dubai. I imagine I'd do quite well for myself in the Muslim nations. They'd find me absolutely enchanting, I'm sure. I'd wear beaded burquas and flowing robes and lamé turbans and be the the Jackie K of the region. My other option is more realistic, though: Prince Carl Philip, Duke of Värmland, second in line to the Swedish throne (right). He's still TOTALLY handsome and I'm probably more suited to being Queen of Sweden anyway. I can already see myself in Heidi braids and a fetching Tyrolean hat with a little chinchilla-lined dirndle. SQUEAL! Now I'm not really sure where this Värmland is, but I'm booking my plane ticket as we speak. I think I'll just go to Stockholm and ask for directions. So 'ta, darlings. You won't have James St. James to kick around anymore. From now on, I'm going to be A QUEEN!



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