You are required to watch The Vampire Diaries and monitor any and all suspicious hair activity that you spy on Ian Somerhalder's character, Damon. Then report back to me with whatever freeze-frame evidence you can accumulate. Obviously, the poor boy's hairline is receding. That's a given. But the CW's cover-up (so to speak) is nearly impossible to detect. As I've mentioned before, they employ long-shots and side-shots and crop-shots to mask the problem. I also suspect they're using a little lace front wiglet in some scenes, and hair clips and weaves in others. And I don't think it's just bitterness and hair envy on my part. So please, won't you back me up on this? I look forward to hearing your reports tomorrow. Class is dismissed.